I didn’t remove a stitch of clothing. I even kept my boots laced up. I lay there like a board next to her. But as soon as we heard Helen’s even breathing, Lily’s hands were everywhere relieving me of all that. “It’s not because I’m not mad at you,” she said. “It’s because I need it.”

“I need it, too,” I said, and I got in under the covers. When she touched me, she was delayed ignition, she was Marie and Shane and even Cameron, all that mess, and when I touched her, I was the old-timers and the ones who’d done her wrong, I was rich and from Manhattan and poor as shit from right here, I was the sap running in the trees and the arrowheads that get churned up when big threatening work is done. We didn’t finish for a long time.

When we did, I raised myself to one elbow, kept my hands in her stream of black hair fanned on the pillow.

“The pipeline might be delayed, but they mean to come here,” I said.

“We got something in the mail,” she said. “Is it bad?”

“It’s worse than they say,” I said.

“What will we do?” she asked. “Where would we go?”

“We’re not going anywhere,” I said.

Then Lily told me about Perley, about Aldi’s failed motions, about Grandma Barlow, about Pariah Park, about Perley’s stiff new clothes, his newfound guile. She told me that he’d made a friend, a real one this time. She told me about the blue pills, the knitting, the yarn, the eggs, the holes. She told me about closing the holes.

“Perley’s sound,” she said. She clasped her hands behind her head. “He’s smart and he’s strong. He’s prepared. He’s your son, even though he still insists he’s an elf or a wolf.”

“He’s my son, all right,” I said.

“He asks about you all the time.”

“What do you say?” I asked.

“I don’t know what to say,” she said. “Next week’s the review hearing.”

“Sorry about the money,” I said. “I tried.”

“I know,” she said.

“We’ll call Frank about septic in the morning,” I said. “Maybe we can work something out. I can go back to nursing. I can pay the rest off over time, I can—” But Lily waved me off.

“You have to talk to Perley,” she said. “That’s what’s important.”

“How?” I asked. “What will I say?” This was where my plan ran out.

“You’re good at figuring things out,” she said. “So figure it out.”

I fell asleep holding her. I dreamed of sumac trees and woke to the full moon staring at me through the window. I didn’t even try to close my eyes against it.