“But we have to be strong for Mom.” He glances at me. “Roger that?”

I nod. “I know. I’ll try.”

“That’s my good girl.”

But these words he’s spoken so often suddenly chafe. I’m not your good girl, I think.

I’m not anybody’s good girl.

My mom is already in bed with a book when we get home. It’s barely eight thirty. Her eyes are puffy, and I know she’s had a bath because I can smell her lime blossom bubble bath in the air, and because I know that she sometimes takes a bath when she needs to cry.

“Hi,” I say from the doorway.

She glances up and smiles at me. “How was the game?”

I shake my head and climb onto the bed next to her, like I did when I was little. “I was having kind of a bad time.”

She turns and pets my head. “What happened?”

I sigh. “I was cold and grumpy. And I had a fight with Hunter. I think I just missed you guys.”

“Aww, come here.” She closes her book and reaches to give me a hug, and I let myself melt into her.

“Mom? Was this morning awful?”

She shakes her head, letting me know she doesn’t want to talk about it. “I finally stopped crying,” she says.

“Okay, no worries,” I say, an ache swelling in my throat.

“How’s the set coming for STOTS?” she asks when she pulls away.

“Not actually terrible,” I say. “A budget of zero dollars really inspires resourcefulness.”

She laughs. “Truer words were never spoken. One of my close friends in high school bought almost all her clothes at thrift shops, and our senior year she was voted Best Dressed.”

“That’s amazing.”

She smiles and leans back, thinking. “She just put the effort in, you know? And she had style — there was no denying that Suzanne had style.”

“What happened to her?” I ask. “Are you still in touch?”

“Actually, I had lost track of my high school friends, but this last year I reached out to some of them.”

My stomach drops as I realize why she might have done that. Did she want a chance to talk to people who were once important to her, before it was too late? In case the cancer won?

“She’s a partner at a top law firm in D.C. She has a five-bedroom house in Great Falls. And she still shops in thrift stores.” My mom laughs.