“There are a million good reasons you shouldn’t do it, but big ones both begin with G: One is graduation, and the other is Gordo. If the school knew, you’d both be toast.”

“But they couldn’t know for sure.”

She considers that. “Maybe faculty couldn’t tell, but you know Gordo’s obsessed with you. He’s already going to be watching you like a hawk—if he thinks even for a second that you guys are there together, it’ll be awful. The scene he’ll make …” She shakes her head. “ ‘Together’ … I mean, I can’t believe I’m even saying that.”

I guess I need to write off getting her help. But then she surprises me with a thoughtful look. “I mean, it might be the sweetest thing he’s ever experienced. You know it’s never happened before.” A light glows in her eyes. “I love Chaz. I want him to know that feeling. If you’re right about him, I mean. But you can’t make a big deal of it. No one can know, or they’ll kick you both out, no question. Can you ‘prompose’ where no one can see you?”

“I can do anything.”

Six days ago, I was shaming Mrs. Somboon-Fox for having me pretend that my prom date was not my prom date, and now I’m all giddy to deliver a stealth promposal. Does this make me a hypocrite or adaptable? The ’80s are messing with me.

While we wait in line at the register, I ask her what Chaz likes—what he’s into. Drama, which I knew, so maybe a line from Romeo and Juliet? She says he digs art, which I didn’t know, but maybe Ernie could help with, except Ernie doesn’t know he has a gay roommate, and I’m not about to tell him.

“He likes to dance, too”—(I knew it)—“but not here, cause it’s a sin.”

“How is he getting his family behind dance school in New York?”

“They think he’s going to major in business.”

“Isn’t lying a sin too?”

She crinkles up her face. “He says it’s a kind of sin that they’re so controlling.” And then she trills a laugh. “Maybe it’s just easy to sin.”

We turn down another theme aisle full of inflatable keyboards and guitars. She lights up. “Oh—that’s it—music. He loves all the new-wavey stuff. Like bands with a lot of synthesizers.”

Thank god she didn’t say like heavy metal (not that I could picture that) or rock because I could not play along. Let’s be honest, most of what I know of ’80s music is from TV commercials or oldies stations, but there’s a “Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” remix I like on TikTok, and “Tainted Love” has been in a zillion movies.