Which was a gross thing to think about. It was like letting a monster sit inside his head and give him notes. But he didn’t seem to be able to throw the monster out.

Gage said, “That sounds like, I don’t know, what did they used to call it? A lovers’ quarrel.”

“You still want to ask her out, don’t you?” Mateo gulped down some more of his drink; it tasted foul, but that didn’t matter. “Stay away from Elizabeth Pike, man. Trust me on this.”

Gage held up his hands, as if in surrender. “Hey, I know the guy code. I’m not going anywhere near your ex.”

“We were only friends,” Mateo said, though the last word stuck in his mouth. All it meant now was that he’d never kissed her. That was the only lie she’d spared him. Why did she stop there? Probably it just would have been too much trouble.

She only took the trouble to pretend to be the one real friend he’d ever known.

“Still. I respect that you need some boundaries there. Okay? But you’re not acting like yourself, and now you want to party with the same stupid people I know you hate. You’re cutting school. No matter what went down with you and Elizabeth, maybe it’s time to get a grip.”

Easy for Gage to say—

But then Mateo realized that he might have had one real friend after all.

He and Gage hadn’t known each other that long, and this was definitely the longest conversation they’d ever had—but Gage was trying to look out for him. This was not an easy talk to have with someone, but they were having it.

Not that it was any of Gage’s business what he did. But—maybe the guy had a point.

Besides, Mateo was past ready to drop this whole scene. The school had called Dad, and he was sick of getting yelled at. He didn’t even enjoy drinking like this. It made him sick and stupid, and feeling either way sucked.

Maybe he was just done.

“You’re right.” Mateo sucked in a deep breath that smelled of salt air. “You’re totally right. I’m standing around feeling sorry for myself, instead of—”

Instead of spending time with Nadia.

Learning whether he could truly trust her, or any witch.

Finding out what it meant to be her Steadfast, and seeing whether he could help her take Elizabeth down.

“Instead of doing what I should be doing,” he finished.

Gage smiled a little. “Can we start with ditching this party? I can drive. We could get some sliders at the White Castle, maybe.”

“Yeah. Let’s.” Mateo tossed his cup into the nearest can. No need to tell Kendall good-bye.

“Come on. Race you!” Gage took off, and Mateo tried to catch him. When Gage started laughing, it felt for one moment like everything was okay—like Mateo was just a guy, no different from anybody else.

But overhead, the stars twisted in the horrible, roiling sky.