“Hey,” she managed to say as he reached her. “You’re back.”

“When you’re glad to be at school, it’s a bad sign.” He grinned at her, but she couldn’t find the strength to smile back. Instantly Mateo leaned closer. “What’s wrong? Is it Elizabeth?”

“No. I mean, yes, but—not exactly.” This wasn’t doing either of them any good. Nadia forced herself to meet Mateo’s eyes as she said, “I can’t do this.”

“Can’t do what?”

“Challenge Elizabeth. Not if it puts everyone I care about in danger. We have to find some way to convince her we’re giving up. And—I don’t know how, but we’ll figure out a way”—Nadia swallowed hard; this was the worst part—“a way to break the bond between us. You can’t be my Steadfast any longer, Mateo.”

He stared back at her. She’d imagined that he might be relieved, but instead he looked wounded … as wounded as she felt. More than anything, she wanted to take it all back, and tell him that of course they were tied together forever. How could it ever be any other way?

Instead she turned and walked away, refusing to look back.

17

NADIA MANAGED TO AVOID BOTH VERLAINE AND MATEO for the rest of the school day, even though she had to hide in the bathroom instead of eating lunch. It felt cowardly, hiding from them—

—no, all of it felt cowardly, period.

I’m not backing down because I’m scared, Nadia reminded herself. It’s because I’m putting too many people in danger. Dad. Cole. Mateo. Elizabeth’s evil—but that doesn’t make her my problem.

That was all true, or true enough. So why did it make her feel so hollow inside?

When the final bell rang, she didn’t even bother returning to her locker, just shouldered her heavy backpack and hurried across the grounds, not looking back. The crowd of laughing, carefree people didn’t seem to have anything to do with Nadia. Even though she’d learned most of their names by now, worked with a couple of people on school projects, they were still strangers, really. And that was how she wanted it.

But it was so easy to imagine them out on the night of the Halloween carnival, acting crazy in their costumes, laughing like this, until the ground began to shake—

“Nadia!” That was Verlaine behind her. Nadia didn’t want to turn around, but she did.

Verlaine and Mateo ran to her, side by side. Why was it surprising to realize they would have talked about this without her? The whole world doesn’t revolve around you, she told herself. But all she could do was grip her backpack straps tightly and stare at the ground as they came closer.

“Wait up,” Verlaine panted, even though Nadia had already stopped walking. “We need to talk to you about this.”

Mateo said nothing, only looked at Nadia with those dark eyes—brown with a touch of gold.

Nadia managed to say, “I realize you guys both need to understand what was done to you. And maybe I can help with that. But this whole thing about figuring Elizabeth out, taking her on—that has to stop.”