“I’m sorry,” Oren said.

“After that…” I sighed. “I sort of freaked out. Started obsessing about dying and what happens… you know, after. It was really scary, but not knowing felt worse, so I get why you want to know. It’s why I started studying what happens at funerals and paying attention, wanting to learn exactly what my parents do and how they make it better for people.” I cringed. “I mean, as better as it can be when you’ve lost someone important.”

“What did they say when you told them about Sam?”

“I never told them.”

“What?” Oren frowned. “But that makes no sense. Your parents are so great and—”

“I know, and it seems silly now,” I admitted. “But at the time…I don’t know. It just felt overwhelming and private, you know? I can’t really explain it.”

“Wait.” Oren blinked at me a few times like he was trying to work something out. “Is that why you’re”—he did air quotes—“a ‘loner’ who ‘doesn’t want friends’?”

I shrugged.

“Evie,” he said. “Did you really think you could avoid getting sad ever again by having no friends for the rest of your life?”

I glared at him and then looked down at my sandals. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

“You can’t just decide not to have friends,” he said.

I snorted. “Uh, yes I can. And I did.”

He laughed, drawing my eyes up to his face.

“What?”

“Evie, that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”

What? Did he really just say that? I started to walk away from him.

“Evie, wait!” He grabbed my arm, stopping me. “Hold up. I don’t think you’re ridiculous, but… okay, here’s a question. What do you think we are?”

“Huh?”

He rolled his eyes. “Uh, I hate to break it to you, Evelyn Walman, but we’re friends. You and me.”

I shook my head. “No we’re not.”

“Call it what you want,” he said, grinning even though his face was still red and blotchy. “But we are totally friends.”

“Shut up,” I said, but I didn’t mean it. Why was my heart pounding so hard?

“Maybe even best friends,” he said with a wink.

“Nuh-uh!” I said, trying not to smile now. “Okay, fine, yes, it seems silly now. But we really had fun. And when I found out what happened to him…well, it really hurt.”

Oren nodded. “I understand. But…” He tilted his head.

“What?” I asked.

“We could have fun, you know.”

I blew a loud raspberry and rolled my eyes. “Okay, whatever, fine. Let’s be”—I did air quotes—“ friends.”

He leaned into me. “Deal.”

“So, friend,” I said. “DYNAH or what?”

“Yes,” he said. “Especially if it makes you stop talking for, like, five seconds.”

I smacked his arm. “You never complained about my talking!”

“I wouldn’t have gotten a word in edgewise if I’d wanted to!” He laughed, and then his face got serious. “I actually like your talking, Evie.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he said seriously. “And what you said before about words being good? You are how I know that’s true. You are a good friend, even if you don’t want to admit that quite yet.”