Dave’s da could hold a grudge, all right, so Dave backed off and disappeared into his room for three months until the dog’s hair grew back and the car-seat cover could be binned. He’d really missed his da when he wasn’t talking to him, but more than that he missed his laughter. It was confusing. All Dave wanted to do was entertain. He didn’t mean to hurt anyone. He liked Bush Farrelly. Although she was hairy she was pretty cool: she was an amazing basketball player and she had a great laugh, one you could hear for miles. When he heard a hearty, contagious laugh, it lit him up and gave him a reason to be. He just wanted some attention, maybe to talk to the girls for a while. The boys didn’t really talk to him: he hated sports and his sense of humour confused them. Girls put up with him for a little longer but, ultimately, everyone turned their backs on Dave, until the day Rave had found him being beaten up by Bush and Josie.

Rave had been cycling home when he’d come upon them. ‘All right, Hayley, Josie. What’s going on here, then?’

‘They’re boxing the head off me, that’s what,’ Dave screamed, covering his face and stomach.

Hayley stopped. ‘Just dealin’ with this dickhead.’

‘What’d he do?’

Josie was still kicking him and Dave was shouting for her to leave off. The dog was sitting in the garden but he couldn’t be relied upon to defend his owner. Since the permanent-marker incident, even the dog had turned his back on Dave.

‘He’s a name caller,’ she said.

‘Nobody likes that but, to be fair, I think he’s had enough, Josie.’

Josie stopped kicking Dave. ‘Never let me hear you call my mate Bush again,’ she said, and even through eyes full of tears Dave saw the smallest smile creep across Rave’s face.

‘Are yous going to youth club on Friday?’ Rave asked.

‘Yeah,’ the girls said.

‘Cool, see yous there.’

‘OK,’ they said, and Dave watched them turn from animals into gooey girls. Giggly bitches.

When they had walked on, Rave gave Dave a hand up. ‘You OK?’

‘Yeah, grand,’ Dave said, wiping away his tears. He picked up his Walkman. The earphones were broken and he felt like crying again. ‘Bleedin’ man-arms is after breakin’ me headphones.’ He sat on his wall.

Rave smiled again and sat beside him. ‘So ya christened Hayley “Bush”.’ Rave was no longer concealing his amusement.

Dave grinned. ‘I thought Hairy was a bit obvious.’

Rave laughed. ‘I like Hairy too but I see what you mean. “Bush” has punch.’

‘Exactly,’ Dave said, getting excited. ‘That’s exactly it.’

‘So you’re new here.’

‘Yeah.’

‘I’m Rave.’

‘I know. I’ve been in your class for a month. I’m Dave. Dave and Rave sounds a bit shite, doesn’t it?’