it was all my fault and you may completely rip apart

my sanity and make me believe you are the best

i’ll ever have because nobody has ever loved me this much

or at least like this i am so lucky to have somebody

like you love me don’t i know how lucky i am and all i do

is keep saying yes and i forgive you and i love you and i think

he doesn’t hit me he doesn’t hit me at least he doesn’t hit me

but if you were here more would you if you were closer

would you hit me if i stood up to you would you hit me if

i left you would you hit me and i think no you would not

even you couldn’t find that cruelty inside of you but i still wonder

is this normal to love somebody yet fear every word that comes out

of their mouth is this normal to be perpetually stranded in this in-

between of apologizing or ignoring because i’m either apologizing

for what you did or ignoring it because i love you it’s all because i

love you so is this normal to love you even like this is this normal

can somebody tell me if this is what love is supposed to be oh my

god can somebody please tell me if this is fucking

normal?

what made you think loving somebody this way

was an okay thing to do?

what made you think this

wouldn’t eventually break me

into pieces?

just another moment with you

i loved you

in the fiercest way,

all guttural and snarling,

the way you only love

someone you would die for.

i would have taken a bullet

for you; could you say the same?

would you dive in front of me

when they pulled the trigger?

would you cough up blood

around the words “i love you”?

i asked you once, i did—

would you die for me?

and you said,

would you want me to die?

which was code for

no.

i said,

of course i don’t want you to die—

and you took that as your way out

of admitting that you wouldn’t,

that it was not like that for you,

that i was not worth a bullet

or a drop of blood.

i know now that a sacrificial love

is hardly love at all,

but that doesn’t change the fact that

i would have taken a bullet for you,

and i think i would have taken a bullet for myself,

too, because that is how i loved you—

would you want me to die?

no, my love, my heart, never.

but would you want me to?

LOVE SHOULDN’T FEEL LIKE A PRISON CELL IT SHOULD FEEL FREE

LOVE SHOULDN’T FEEL LIKE A PRISON CELL IT SHOULD FEEL FREE

LOVE SHOULDN’T FEEL LIKE A PRISON CELL IT SHOULD FEEL FREE

LOVE SHOULDN’T FEEL LIKE A PRISON CELL IT SHOULD FEEL FREE