Chapters (8)
Nick starts to go. The phone rings.
Nick Your phone’s …
Ansaphone (male mice), ‘Hey listen, I just wanted to say how profoundly sorry … look, I know I fucked up … and I really thought I’d broken this pattern of… I’m really trying to work though this … control issue or whatever it is. I’m really … I want to understand why I have this need to hurt you. And I want to, I need to talk about it. And I thought if I came over. Look. I know you’re there. I know you’re listening to this. And. I want to wash the blood away. I want to … I’m coming over now. I’m …
Nick pich up the phone.
Nick Simon?… It doesn’t matter who I am. It doesn’t matter.
Nadia enters. She has a hand mirror and a flannel for mopping up the blood. Nick doesn’t see her.
Nick (to phone) Because I’m a great big enormous angry bastard and I’m staying here, so don’t you come anywhere fucking near her alright? Alright?
Nick puts the phone down.
Nadia You’re quite a frightened person aren’t you?
Nick What?
Nadia A frightened person. And you’re an angry person.
Nick Well yeah.
Nadia Yes, They’re often very linked. Fear and anger, I’m a nice person.
Nick Yeah.
Nadia No. I am. Which is not such an easy thing to say. I mean I can say it now. I’m a nice person. But that’s quite a new thing for me, you know?
Nick Right.
Nadia We had to practise. With a mirror.
Nadia looks into the mirror.
I’m a nice person.
Nick I see.
Nadia I had to be given permission to do that you know? Because before, of course, no-one was giving me permission but now … And what about you?
Nadia holds out the mirror.
Give it a go. If you’re ready to … give it a go.
Nick looks in the mirror.
Nadia What are you thinking?
Nick I…
Nadia Don’t censor yourself. First thing that comes into your head.
Nick Fucking old.
Nadia Yes?
Nick I think I look fucking old.
Nadia And how does that make you feel?
Nick Just… ancient.
Nadia You’ve got a great face. It’s a face with character.
Nick I used to look a lot better than this.
Nadia You are where you are.
Nick I mean I was never Steve McQueen …
Nadia Steve McQueen?
Nick Yeah. I was never …
Nadia Who’s Steve McQueen?
Nick He was … he must have been before your time.
Nadia You’re not trapped by your face though are you? You’re not going to let that trap you.
Nick I’ve never been bothered with appearances.