“Then…totally,” Auden answered about the pie.

“Okay. I’ll get pie,” I said. “You get your books.” I turned my attention back to Pippa. “Sweets? How about you?”

She kept staring at me a moment before she snapped out of it and told me, “I have a paper to write.”

“Oh God, I hope it isn’t a long one,” I mumbled.

“It’ll go faster with pie,” she declared.

I winked at her and replied, “Gotcha. Need my laptop?”

“I have mine.”

“Okay. Let’s get on it,” I said, moving back to the pie.

I was quaking inside and I let that happen.

Outside, I was holding it together.

Maybe one day I’d be able to completely deal.

Maybe not.

It didn’t matter.

This was working.

* * * * *

The TV was playing. The kids were on the couch watching it. I was in my armchair with a full glass of wine I hadn’t touched in an hour and a half.

My eyes were to the television but my mind was on my phone, which was sitting at the base of my wineglass on the table beside me.

I was still quaking inside and now it was worse. It was lucky I was sitting down because I could give the appearance of relaxed lounging when I was not relaxed in the slightest.

It was after eleven. And it was precisely three hours and forty-two minutes since Mickey rushed out to fight a fire on the jetty.

How long did it take to fight a fire?

My phone rang and I couldn’t contain my jump, which I fancied sent me inches into the air in my chair.

I sensed my kids jumping with me.

I looked to the phone and felt a sweet release when I saw on the display that it was Mickey.

I snatched it up and leaped from the chair as I took the call and put the phone to my ear.

“Hey,” I greeted.

“Hey back,” he replied as I walked the landing in front of my wall of windows.

“Everything okay?” I asked.

“Fire’s out,” he answered.

“Everyone’s fine?” I pushed.

“We’re all good, baby,” he said softly, but he sounded tired.

I felt my shoulders slump as I stopped, dropped my head and kept the phone to my ear.

“Good,” I whispered then suddenly lifted my head, twisted and gave a thumb’s up and a reassuring smile to my kids, both of whom were looking over the couch at me.

Pippa clapped silently and Auden gave me a relieved grin.

I turned my attention back to my feet. “Was there a lot of damage?”

“Four shops gutted, fire and smoke damage to the rest of the jetty. It wasn’t good, Amy. Had to call all the rigs in all over the county.”

“Oh my God,” I breathed.