Mickey’s didn’t. His long legs brought him in my space where he bent quick, hand cupped on the back of my head to tilt it, and he brushed his lips against mine so briefly, it was a memory while it was happening.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

“That’s okay,” I forced out.

He let me go and looked between the kids. “Sorry to cut this short. Good meal. Cool to meet you.”

“No probs,” Auden replied as Mickey moved swiftly to the door. “Cool to meet you too.”

“Be safe!” my daughter, far more together than me, called as the door was closing on Mickey.

I stared at the door.

There in ten.

I kept staring at the door.

Fire on the jetty.

“Mom, you okay?”

Mickey was off to fight a fire on the jetty.

“Hey, Mom, you okay?”

I blinked and saw Pippa in my space.

“There’s a fire on the jetty,” I whispered and watched my daughter watching me and then I saw her face twist.

Fear.

For Mickey, maybe.

For me, that was the bigger possibility.

I’d proved to both my kids that I couldn’t handle extreme situations.

She thought I was going to lose it.

So I had to pull myself together for a variety of reasons.

For my daughter, who, like my son possibly was with his father, had me to look to to learn how to cope with life and all it could throw at you.

For Mickey, who loved being a firefighter and wanted me in his life so I had to prove I had it in me to deal when something like this happened. He fought fires. He didn’t need to do it at the same time worried his woman was at home falling apart with worry.

And for my son, who possibly was manning up, thinking he had to take care of his mom, and who also didn’t need to worry about his mother falling apart.

Mickey was trained. Mickey was experienced. Mickey had done this before.

I had to trust in him and in the fates that brought him to me. And I had to trust that having him, thus having happiness, the fates wouldn’t then sweep it all away.

I drew in breath and focused on my daughter.

“Okay, do we want pie? And I didn’t ask, did you guys get your schoolwork done? This was a big night for us and we were all busy preparing. But now there’s time so you can hit it without having to stay up until midnight.”

Pippa stared at me in blank surprise.

“I got stuff to do,” Auden shared.

I looked to my son. “You want to do it eating pie?”

He was examining me closely.

He stopped doing that, gave me a gentle grin and asked, “Am I Auden Moss?”

“You are,” I confirmed, grinning back. It might be forced but damn it, I did it.