I log into my game when I get back from class. Before Austin, I used to spend a couple of hours every day working on Uforia. It takes a lot of effort to keep a country running, after all. A few days are a lifetime in game time. But now having Austin over almost every day, I haven’t even logged on in a week, other than to talk to Jackie. The little firecracker doesn’t let me forget it either. She hits me up in video chat as soon as I log on.

“Where the fuck have you been?” she screeches at me. “I thought about calling the cops in case you were trapped under something heavy, like Austin’s cock.”

I don’t respond to her taunting. It only encourages her.

“Yeah, sorry. I’ve been out for a bit. School has been crazy lately.”

“Bullshit. School isn’t what’s been keeping you up all night.”

“Whatever, Jackie.” I don’t bother arguing with her. She’s right. Austin is what kept me up last night. And I loved every earth-shattering minute of it. “What’s new?”

“Nothing much. Same old douche canoes needing to be reminded what manners are. I don’t want to talk about these jackholes. Let’s talk about your sexy slice of a man.”

“I’d rather not. Has The Federation lifted sanctions against Cordovia?”

“Well, I wish I could pee standing up and chocolate bars grew on trees. The secret to happiness in life is getting used to disappointment. And who the fuck cares about Cordovia? I want to hear about Austin’s big, beautiful cock.”

“Ewww, Jackie!” I can’t keep my face from turning bright red. I hate it when Jackie pushes my buttons this bad. I wish I had better control over myself. “And technically speaking, chocolate does grow on trees. The cocoa plant whose scientific name is theobroma cacao—”

“God, you’re such a nerd it hurts sometimes.” She doesn’t let me share my wealth of random plant knowledge. Guess we’re done with that topic. “So, did you try on that sexy little negligee for him last night?”

“I did…” I trail off, hoping not to have to explain the rest of the night. My face will turn a whole new shade of red, previously not seen in nature.

“And?”

“And he took it off me and we fooled around.” I’m vague, but more descriptive than I was hoping to be. I doubt it will be enough to appease Jackie.

“Tell me everything. Describe every girthy inch.”

“I couldn’t say.”

“Oh, come one. Give a single girl something to get through those long lonely nights.”

“No, I mean, I really couldn’t say. He never got naked.”

“Pump the breaks. You mean he’s seen all your little bits, but you have no idea what he’s packing underneath the hood? How’s that even possible?”