It’s Ronan. He squeezes a large rock in his hand.

“Leave. Her. Alone.”

The two stand silent. Unmoving. We all do.

Then he steps forward and says something I’d have never expected. “I cry sometimes. Don’t you?”

• • •

By the time I get to the house, Wheel of Fortune is already on. Grammy eats from a tube of saltine crackers; the crumbs on her chest remind me of the sand I just left.

“Hey there! How’s my girl?”

“Fine.”

“Good day?”

“Uh-huh.”

We sit in silence except for when Grammy leans forward to speak to Spencer from Topeka. “Man alive! How many letters do you need? It’s right under your nose!”

Spencer promptly gives the right answer, and Grammy falls back with the satisfaction that she has helped him win a couple grand.

When a commercial comes on, Grammy turns to me. “Something happen to hurt you today, baby?”

I’m not really surprised she knows; Grammy seems to hear me the most when I don’t say anything at all.

I want to rest on her soft shoulder, but I know I only have until Spencer comes back from the commercial break. “Brandy and Tressa don’t want me around anymore.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. That must hurt something awful.”

“Yeah. I gave Brandy a present, and . . . I ended up crying, and they made fun of me.”

She gathers me up in her pillowy arm and kisses the top of my head. “Now, there’s nothing wrong with crying if you’re a human. Lizards and ants and buffalo—they don’t cry as far as I know. But if a person can break into laughter, then what’s wrong with a few tears?”

I look up at her and shrug.

“Nothin’. Absolutely nothing. But there is something you must remember about those feelings deep down inside. They come from your soul, and they’re a precious thing. They should be saved for the ones who’ll be cradling them like a new baby. You don’t hand them off to just anyone. The ones that love you protect your feelings because they’ve been given a piece of you. Others may toss them around for just the same reason.”

The Wheel of Fortune music begins. Grammy reaches for another saltine, and I know that she will have no more to say. I sit unmoving. My eyes watch the game on TV, but I can’t tell you if the guy from Topeka loses, wins, or dies. I just know that I’ll never forget what she’s said to me and I swear I’ll never make the same mistake again.

Chapter 14

RETURN OF THE MADRE

Running where the waves touch the beach makes it feel like I’m running faster than I am. My entire body hurts, but I won’t slow down. It feels like trying to wring out a towel that just isn’t wet enough to drip anymore and yet you keep squeezing and twisting, hoping that some drops will fall.