“You know I’m leaving.” She pulled away from him. “You’ve known all along.”

He reached out and flicked on the bedside lamp. “You said you’d come back this time.”

She blinked like an owl and sat up, curling her arms around her legs. A defensive, closed-off pose. “Here and there.”

Here and there. Christ. “I thought maybe, given all we’ve come to mean to each other, you could use San Diego as your base. Instead of San Francisco.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that I’m still gone more than I’m around.”

“I’m not asking you to change your job, Red.”

“No, you’re only asking me to change my life.”

“I love you. And goddamnit, I think you love me back.”

She said nothing, just stared at him.

And though his heart cracked and separated into a million pieces within his chest, he let out a low laugh. “Okay, maybe you don’t.”

“Can’t.”

“Won’t.”

She tightened her mouth and looked at Ashes asleep at the foot of the bed. “I don’t know what you want from me.”

“Something you apparently can’t give me,” he said softly, feeling destroyed. He grabbed his shorts. “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?”

“Because I let you think I could pull this off. That I could have a casual relationship with you and then let you walk away.”

“No.” Her voice was thick. “Remember in the beginning? You told me you couldn’t handle me walking away again. You wanted to stay away from me, but I wouldn’t let that happen. This is my fault, not yours.”

“Yeah, well, whoever’s fault it is doesn’t matter.” He felt raw. “I’ve gotta go.”

At the word “go,” Ashes leapt down, at the ready to follow him to the ends of the earth.

Joe stepped into his one shoe, grabbed his crutches.

“Joe, stop,” Summer protested. “This is your place. I’ll go.” She slipped into her sundress and sandals, and then had to walk by him on her way to the door. She stopped to press her mouth to his.

He tasted lost dreams, broken hearts and tears, and he couldn’t do it, he couldn’t let her go. He snagged her hand, holding her to him.

She hesitated, then without looking back, pulled free.

“I don’t want you to be alone,” he said to her back.

“I’ll stay with Chloe.” And then she was gone.

Ashes sat on his good foot and whined softly.

“Yeah,” he murmured, and stroked her head. “I know just how you feel.”

Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Summer spent the next few days trying not to think about anything other than numbers, because if she did, she just might realize that she’d walked away from the best thing that had ever happened to her. Her days seemed longer without Joe in them, the nights eternal.