“It’s stupid! We all need to accept who we are. That we can’t change. If this proves anything, it proves that! And these stupid dreams of ours, they’re just nonsense!”

“Don’t say that!”

“Grandad and this seed and you and your dancing! We’re just kidding ourselves. The world. It doesn’t care!”

Marty knew that he’d hurt her. She didn’t need to say anything, but he was so angry. It was like he’d just opened the door to that room he’d stuffed all his hurts into, and stuff had started tumbling out. “People promise things they don’t mean. We can’t change who we are. What we’ve been given!”

Gracie had gotten up.

“I know you’re angry, but…”

“Yes, I’m angry! I’m angry all right. I’m angry that I’m stuck, with her, in that house, and I’m angry that I don’t have any choice. And I’m angry that she’s so useless, and I’m angry that this is all so pointless, and I’m tired! I’m sick and tired of trying and trying and getting nowhere!”

Gracie listened, her face impassive.

“You’ve got me, your grandad.”

“Grandad!?” Marty laughed. “What does he do? He just does NOTHING! NOTHING! He just sits there and comes up with all these stupid plans, and they mean NOTHING! That’s why Grandma kicked him out! Because he couldn’t actually come up with a plan that worked!”

There was no sound except the sound of Marty’s heavy breathing. Then came the little cough behind Gracie. It was Grandad. He’d pulled off his trilby and was standing there holding it against his chest. Marty looked from Gracie’s face to his grandad’s and back again. He felt sick. As if all that stuff that just came out had an awful, nasty taste.

“Look, I’m sorry,” he said to Gracie.

She nodded. It was deadly quiet.

“I’d better go to school anyway,” Gracie said, and turned, hiking her bag up on her shoulder.

“Gracie, I’m sorry…,” but she’d already turned and she couldn’t hear him. Marty watched her walk head down through the allotments toward school. Marty stood in Grandad’s gaze a moment. Embarrassment burning his cheeks. Grandad let a few moments pass.

“Well, thank goodness for that,” he said at last. “A bit of fire. I actually thought for a moment there that your little flame had gone out.”

Marty lifted up his head.

“What?”

“I’ve been wondering when you’d wake up … like that seed. Burst open a bit. Good Lord, I thought it would never happen.” He smiled and went to pour himself some tea.

Marty’s shoulders dropped.

“It’s not healthy, you know, holding everything in, holding everything back … that is precisely why I ain’t got nothing and your mum has everything.”

“You’re not angry?”

Grandad laughed.