Chapters (55)
My comment is met with silence, even from Braden, who is amazingly not already crying. He raises his hand hesitantly.
“If you want to talk about blame, I’m kind of an expert. I’m the boy who carried a gas can over an open bonfire. There was no one else to blame but myself. And for a long time, I did. Every surgery, I told myself I deserved the pain. It was my fault when my dad left. My fault for making my mom a single parent buried in medical bills.”
He pulls his sleeve up so we can see his splotchy arm, the skin all wrinkled and discolored from his shoulder down to where his forearm cul-de-sacs.
“But after years of blaming myself, guess what.” He rubs his other hand up and down his scars. “I’m still burned. Guilt can’t unscar my skin. I guess what I’m saying is blame is useless.”
“He’s right,” Olivia chimes in. “I know it’s kind of weird I still come to these groups. I should be better by now, right?”
I don’t dare nod.
“But I don’t come because I need to be fixed. I come because I’m accepted, just the way I am.” She looks up at me. “You can’t fix Piper. All you can do is be stronger together.”
Dr. Layne concludes by telling us to show love to someone today, even if we just love ourselves. I almost laugh out loud thinking of how Piper would have said Braden probably loves himself on the regular.
Then Dr. Layne leads us in a group hug that hits an easy 10.5 on the awkward-o-meter. But when I start to inch away after a quick squeeze, Olivia pulls me back in. She laces her arm through mine as Dr. Layne folds me against her side and Braden props his half arm on Olivia’s shoulder.
I let them pull me in, and as I give in to the embrace, the room suddenly doesn’t feel so empty. In that vast room, standing skin to skin—scar to scar—our small and slightly broken circle of trust fills the space.
On my way out, Dr. Layne gives me another brochure about burn camp and tells me to “give it some thought.”
This time, I take it.
I check my post when I get home. No sign of Piper. But I have to scroll through the comments on the #scarsisters picture three times to reach the end.
Queenchloe84 Ava! Where have you been?!
4eva_emma Love the pink hair.
Nightavenger You look great! We miss you down here!
Sttb704 You are an inspiration!
My gut reaction is to scoff at the pages and pages of words. Pathetic. Awkward. Empty.