between unreal and real

“Today only!”

Red blouse in the window,

on sale each time I go by

You love boiled tofu for dinner.

Remembering,

I buy a little earthen pot

Cosmos flowers sway

in front of model homes

no one will ever live in

Pick up the receiver,

happy someone thought of me

in the middle of the night

Wednesday your words “See you”—

the same as ever

yet somehow not

On Thursday, wanting despite myself

to trust you,

I wear a psychedelic T-shirt

Unanswered ring tells me you’re still out

Where have you gone drinking?

Who’s getting drunk with you?

Thinking you too must be

listening to this radio show

I switch it off in mid-laugh

“It’s okay with me,” you say—

not understanding what’s okay,

I nod

I can’t believe you mean

all that counts is a good time—

do I know you?

Late afternoon—

you and I gaze at the same thing

as between us something ends

Sitting in a coffee shop

with a man who isn’t you,

making him say, “Then I’ll wait five years”

Lights at dusk

in Heartbreak Hotel—

a place you sang of once

Remember the August morning

you started up the engine

and carried me away?

Like getting up to leave

a hamburger place—

that’s how I’ll leave

that man

Like a whiskey bottle on reserve too long

that man’s no longer mine—

skies are clear today

It’s enough to be your lover

sings someone in a song,

making it sound so easy

Now that I wait for you no more,

sunny Saturdays and rainy Tuesdays

are all the same to me

Baseball Game

Wrapped in a green sweater

as though folded deep in your arms—

winter comes on

On a Sunday morning

fragrant with navel oranges,

I boil two eggs to perfection

I check my tear-stained reflection,

remembering that you said

“Stay beautiful”

More than dozens of words of love,

one chill word

preoccupies me

Knight in leather jacket

astride your motorcycle,

for you let the sunset blaze!

Underline the words

hard enough to tear the page—

“to love and not have faith”

Eating takeout sushi with you,

only 300 yen—

tastes so good I know I’m in love

Shielded by you in a crowded train,

I gaze up close

at fine down on your face

Every time I look at the public bath wall,

three of them lined up for sale—

“ear-cleaning sets”

With you, for better or worse,

even when I’m gargling

I feel like a woman

Longing to see

the ocean in December,

we board the Romance Express

A day playing at Enoshima Beach—

you have your future, I mine,

and so we take no snapshots

Grieve with me—

the sureness of your touch

catching Frisbees

is missing in this romance

Throwing stones in the waves,

he never looks my way—

young man wild like the sea

I cherish the bit of crimson

staining your finger

as you open a raw oyster for me

Skeptical of promises,