Decker’s mouth dropped open.

She shrugged.

“Bye,” she said.

“You’re moving?”

“Yes.”

“Permanently?”

She nodded.

“You’re leaving the yeshiva?”

“It was a womb for me, Peter—nurturant, protective. It served its purpose. Now I have to get on with my life.”

“Just like that? You’re picking up your kids and moving to New York?”

Again she nodded.

Decker was dumbfounded.

“What do the boys think about it?” he managed to choke out.

“They’re very excited.”

“What are you going to do there?” Decker got up and began to pace. His heart clopped against his chest and his head began to throb. “I mean have you thought about what the hell you’re going to do there?”

“My husband’s parents have found me an apartment very close to them,” she answered calmly. “I’ve always gotten along very well with my in-laws. Much, much better than with my own parents. They’re delighted to have me come out, and especially happy to get a chance to really know their grandchildren. I’m also very close to one of Yitzchak’s sisters. She’s found me a job.”

Decker began to panic.

“What kind of a job?” he asked.

“A bookkeeper in her husband’s factory.”

“What kind of factory?” he asked. As if he gave a shit!

“He’s a wholesale furrier. He makes furs for the major department stores.”

“What do you know about bookkeeping?” he said, challenging her. Why am I asking her stupid questions?

“I’m a math teacher, remember?”

“That’s not the same as bookkeeping!” How can she be so fucking clam!

“I’m sure I can figure it out,” she said. “Peter, there is nothing here for me anymore. My house is a nightmare of lost love and what should have been. If I stay in this town any longer, I’ll rot.”

He walked over to the living room window and peered into the darkness outside.

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” she asked, joining him at the window. “Freedom?”

“I never said I wanted to…” He was flustered. “I just wanted a little elbow room, damn it! The yeshiva is so goddam stultifying. I had no idea you were going to pick up and leave me.”

“I’m not leaving you.”

“What do you call this?”

“I’m giving you the distance you wanted. That is what you wanted, wasn’t it? Distance. A breather from each other, as you called it.”

He shook his head no.

“Then what do you want?”

“I don’t know,” he whispered to himself.

“What?”

“I don’t know,” he yelled. He ran his hands over his face. “God, I don’t believe this. How could you just leave me like this! Is that the extent of your feelings for me?”

“What do you want out of me?”

“I want you to fight for us, damn it. Not just…give up and move away.”