“We had a budget!” I screeched.

“I know, I know, I know,” Elvira replied, lifting her hands up, palms toward me, pressing them my way repeatedly. “But, girlie, I don’t do cute. I got flummoxed. I lost it, ended up in Forever 21 and had a breakdown. It got so extreme, I had to call in Malik.”

On the word Malik she threw a hand toward the man on my couch and I looked to him.

“I’m Malik,” he said in a voice that slid over me like warm syrup. “Elvira’s man.”

I was in a panic, but still, regardless of Elvira’s exceptional style, her beautiful face, her fabulous skin, and her hairdo that I knew even without the stylist education I intended to get one day suited her absolutely perfectly, I took the precious time to be shocked at her man.

Not that she could land him.

Just that he was Hollywood handsome in the sense that I was pretty sure he was famous, because if there was anything right in this world, he simply had to be.

“Uh… hi,” I greeted shyly.

His full lips curled up, exposing white teeth.

My scalp started tingling.

“Malik can shop,” Elvira stated and I tore my eyes off her man. “He’s so good at it, I could retire. Example,” she swept her hand down her fabulous dress to flick out, indicating her more fabulous shoes, telling me Malik picked them, which said it all. “I won’t retire, because if I can’t shop, I might stop breathing, but just sayin’, he’s good at it.”

“I can see that, Elvira,” I snapped, walking to the back of the couch. “Since there are seven thousand bags in my living room!” I ended this on a yell.

“We can take back what you don’t want,” Elvira returned. “But now we got a lot to go through and you don’t got a lotta time. So, girl,” she rolled her hand at me, “get your ass over here.”

I got my behind over there, and I did it by putting a hand to the back of the couch and leaping over it, which knocked five bags to the floor.

Elvira’s eyebrows shot up. I heard deep laughter that was like vocal silk, along with a rough biker chuckle that was almost the best sound in the world (second only to Travis’s giggle).

I ignored all that and started dumping stuff out of bags.

Elvira joined me and we were laying out outfits (embarrassingly with matching undies but I couldn’t give in to the embarrassment of doing this in front of Malik, or the possibility he’d picked some of them for me, I had to focus) when I heard Joker say, “Mrs. Heely, gotta let you know that we’re probably gonna be a little late.”

At that, my head snapped to the side, my vision blurred with livid horror and I screeched, “Don’t tell her that! She’s gonna think I’m rude! You’re never late to a dinner party, even if it’s family! We’ll be on time if it kills me!”