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Chapters (53)
  1. Front Cover
  2. Letter from the Author
  3. Title Page
  4. Copyright
  5. Contents
  6. • One •
  7. • Two •
  8. • Three •
  9. • Four •
  10. • Five •
  11. • Six •
  12. • Seven •
  13. • Eight •
  14. • Nine •
  15. • Ten •
  16. • Eleven •
  17. • Twelve •
  18. • Thirteen •
  19. • Fourteen •
  20. • Fifteen •
  21. • Sixteen •
  22. • Seventeen •
  23. • Eighteen •
  24. • Nineteen •
  25. • Twenty •
  26. • Twenty-One •
  27. • Twenty-Two •
  28. • Twenty-Three •
  29. • Twenty-Four •
  30. • Twenty-Five •
  31. • Twenty-Six •
  32. • Twenty-Seven •
  33. • Twenty-Eight •
  34. • Twenty-Nine •
  35. • Thirty •
  36. • Thirty-One •
  37. • Thirty-Two •
  38. • Thirty-Three •
  39. • Thirty-Four •
  40. • Thirty-Five •
  41. • Thirty-Six •
  42. • Thirty-Seven •
  43. • Thirty-Eight •
  44. • ∞ •
  45. • Thirty-Nine •
  46. • Forty •
  47. Epilogue
  48. Acknowledgments
  49. Excerpt from Be Dazzled
  50. One
  51. Two
  52. About the Author
  53. Back Cover

“Wait, before you go, can I ask another question?”

Tentative, Ursula nodded.

“That night, on the path, there were these…things, with many legs…like, monsters.” A few freshman drifted by, making Kane aware of how strange this sounded. Ursula watched the freshman, as though keeping track of who had overheard. Kane lowered his voice.

“And after you saved me from them, and I mentioned Maxine—”

Ursula cut him off.

“I didn’t save you from anything. I was out for a run. I run outside all the time. I’m very sporty.” This was clearly a rehearsed explanation. Kane was right; she was a terrible liar. She went on. “We can discuss what you think you saw later. Not here. And if you think you see anything else, text me, okay? We usually have lunch together during sixth period. You’ll be fine until then, I promise.”

And she dashed off. Again.

Kane was alone in the hallway, baffled. Somewhere in the last few minutes a grittiness had risen up in the girl who baked cookies and feared birds. He’d glimpsed that edge again, and through it had seen another version of the world. A version that Ursula meant to guard.

His mind returned to the boy. Dean Flores. Even thinking the name brought back that eerie sensation of being watched, as though Dean’s eyes had taken ahold of Kane and never put him back down. Even now, it was like Dean could peer through the bricks and metal of the school to where Kane stood, stupefied, trying to put the pieces together.

Determination spread over him, straightening his back and clenching his fists. Dean Flores. Ursula Abernathy. These people knew him. Or they knew about him. He was sure they stood between him and the answers he needed.

And if they weren’t going to give Kane what he needed, fine. He’d take it at any cost. He had nothing left to lose.

• Six •

The Others

For half the day no one spoke to Kane, and it was lovely.

In Statistics and Analysis, Kane was allowed to opt out of the pop quiz. In Spanish, Señora Pennington skipped Kane as the class took turns correcting sentences on a handout. In biology, Kane got to sit out the lab and stay at his desk and “catch up on the reading he’d missed.” Instead, he took out the photo and studied it.

And no one cared.

Or, if they cared, no one dared say anything. Rumor had likely spread about Kane’s outburst toward Viv, and the warm welcomes of homeroom had gone cold. People gave Kane space. Kane gave Kane space. He watched over his own shoulder as he scribbled shoes into his journal. He drifted beyond himself, like a demon unsure about possessing this body or a ghost debating residency in this house.

He wondered who wore white sneakers and who wore gray flats.