“And that’s what Devney was for me. I would’ve married her. I planned on asking her, even though a part of me was hesitant. I don’t doubt that I loved her, but how fucked up is it that I would’ve married her, knowing that she loved another dude?”

I clasp his shoulder, squeezing tight. “At least you’re not in love with the girl who broke your heart, showed up again, made out with twice, and then pushed away.”

“I see you’re the healthy one out of us.”

“Far fucking from it.”

“What’s the issue with her? Why are you pushing her away?”

I glance at the mess around me, feeling like this room looks. “Because of this.”

“What?” He pulls his head back and quirks his lip.

“This is what happens. Things are destroyed when it doesn’t work out.”

Oliver doesn’t say anything as he leans down, gathering the papers and putting them in a box. He lifts it and then hands it to me. “And then there’s this.”

Now it’s my turn to be confused. “A box?”

“No, it’s cleaned up. I keep thinking how we’re all making these mistakes by trying to not make them.”

“Oliver, I have no clue what the hell you’re saying.”

He sighs deeply. “So what if there’s a mess at the end? Who gives a shit if things don’t work out or we aren’t getting what we want at the finish line? We can pick the pieces up and pack them away. Isn’t it supposed to be about the journey? I’m tired of living this way, Grayson. I want to get married and have kids. I want to be fucking happy. When I was back home last week, all I could see were people who didn’t have money or hated their jobs, but they looked happy because they weren’t alone.”

“I see it every day.”

“And you don’t want that?”

He has no fucking idea. “I built a house because I hoped someone would live in it with me,” I remind him.

“Yeah, and now she’s back and you’re afraid.”

“Damn right I’m afraid!” I yell, tossing the box on the floor. “I know what it feels like to lose her.”

Oliver nods slowly. “You also know what it’s like to love her. I guess the question is, which one is worth more?”

I’m done with this conversation. “Let’s clean this up,” I suggest sternly. “Then we’ll call him and let him know about the damage.”

Thankfully, he takes the hint and we start working on cleaning up the messes we can.

Chapter 18

Jessica

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Stella asks as I push the phone to my ear.