Tirad quietly closes Lealy’s cabin door. He hears a voice from the opposite cabin. He recognises the girl’s voice. She is talking to her mother in a foreign language that he can’t understand. The girl had said her mother was not from Oxan. Tirad had seldom seen people from other regions that spoke different languages. He wants to go in and hear their tongue more clearly, to sit in a corner and draw their faces on a piece of paper. He wished he could sketch their exotic language. He has many questions. All things about these women are a mystery to him. He will have enough time with them in the two days journey to Oxan. The boats bring people together, provide an opportunity to talk, tell tales and recall memories. But his desire is not just to speak with and learn about them. Knowing their life story and becoming acquainted with them doesn’t seem to be enough. He has an unusual desire, wanting to conquer them and own their lives. Even with all the bitter things he has heard about Asin’s life, he prefers to swap his life with hers. His boring and steady life on the Saviour Ship has been nothing but a meaningless mixture of continuous errors, efforts, pardons, competitions, temptations, piety, fear and more fear. Would he give it all up for an adventurous life like Asin’s? He is too scared to think it would be possible. And the same fear, this time of new temptations, drives him away from the strangers’ cabin door and makes him continue his way down the corridor.

Chapter 10

Tirad turns the key in the old lock. The Library door opens with a stretched rusty sound. This is the first time that he is entering the ‘forbidden library’. He always thought that the name was made up by the fourth and third tier disciples, but Hurmaz had used the same wordings that day as he gave him the key. Tirad had read all the books in the common library, but not the ones in this cabin. No one is allowed to come to this library except for the Circle members or with a permit from the First Disciple. It has happened before that the healers needed a book for a special medical case, to be able to diagnose a disease or to find a cure. But none of them were ever able to get in. They had to give the name of the book – probably found in a common books’ sources – and one of the Circle members would get them the information they wanted. Tirad blows on the oil lamp to turn it off and lights his way in with his torch. It is not a large cabin. The bookshelves cover all the walls. A wide table lies in the middle, taking up most of the cabin space. It is covered with large, rolled papers. There is hardly enough room for Tirad to stand by the shelves. He doesn’t know where to start and what to look for. But he might find something in the old manuscripts of the Saviour, some parts that must have been missed when copies were made from them. He had heard about this before but he is not sure if it’s true. But if it is, the omitted parts must be here. The complete and original handwritten Saviour Narratives must be in this room somewhere. He should have asked Hurmaz where they were kept. Now he has to spend the whole night looking for them.