Too much reading had made him lonely. He had no friends and he was only happy in his limited alone times when he could read and sketch what he had read about, on his more limited share of paper in the bleak light of a small candle he had been given. He liked to show his drawings to others and join them in the pleasure he had experienced while sketching them. But his pictures had become vaguer for those who had no familiarity with the stories and settings of pre-rain times. The boys used his drawings against him and made fun of him even more. The only person that paid attention to his drawings was Hurmaz who would look at them interestingly and would praise Tirad for his unique work. He was happy for this attention. The only picture he never showed to anyone, not even to Hurmaz, was the picture he had drawn of his father. A man’s face with tears trailing on his cheeks with sad and scared eyes and shaking lips that tried hard to say a word: the picture of his father right before he had said his last goodbye to him.

Chapter 5

Hurmaz sits in front of Tirad. Lealy comes in with two dishes. Tirad tries to separate in his nose the appetising smell of the roast fish from the stench of the oil lamp, both sourced from the sea creatures. Tirad can’t take his eyes from her and stares at her every movement, the way she delicately moves her short, wide fingers and puts the dishes on the table to the gentle bending of her waist as she does that. He suddenly notices Hurmaz’s glance and throws his head down. Although he wasn’t just looking at Lealy in praise of her beauty, he didn’t know what to look at to avoid becoming eye to eye with Hurmaz. He is worried that Hurmaz might want to scold him for having spoken so unwisely in the Circle meeting. Lealy turns around elegantly on her plump legs and walks towards the cabin door. Hurmaz starts eating but Tirad loses his appetite because of the bad smell of the oil lamps that seems to have overcome the smell of the food and the frown he sees in Lealy’s face as she goes out.

“Don’t worry! You didn’t say anything wrong!” Hurmaz says after he swallows his bite. Tirad, still puzzled and unsure, looks at him and finally exhales his trapped breath.

“Eat! I know you are hungry. We haven’t eaten together for a long time but I have raised you myself and I know you can’t focus right with an empty stomach!” Hurmaz continues. Tirad starts eating his fish and although he knows that Hurmaz is staring at him the whole time, he won’t take his eyes off his plate. He is careful not to take in any fish bones. The thought of a fish bone getting stuck makes him feel itchy in his throat and he coughs a short, dry cough, projecting more chewed fish out of his mouth. He feels embarrassed. He doesn’t know why he eats like a small child every time someone watches him.