Charlottenburg, Berlin

26 December 1942

My dearest Karl-Heinrich,

Not a moment of the day or night passes when you are not foremost in my thoughts. Yesterday was so difficult: Christmas is a time for joy and families and I have neither. Christine persuaded me, against my better judgement I have to say, to join her family for dinner on Christmas Eve. It was like entering a different world. They were so happy and I so sad. Christine is a dear friend and one of the few people I am able to talk to, but her life is so different to mine. She has her parents and her four wonderful children, while my dear parents are no longer and I have failed the Führer and you through my inability to have children.

I am of course blessed with you, my wonderful husband, though your absence pains me deeply. Christine is so fortunate Friedrich is now based in Berlin. I don’t want to sound bitter, but I didn’t see any sign of his injury impairing him: for someone whose knee was apparently so badly injured, he certainly managed to dance very well!

But then I was racked with guilt. Here I am in our beautiful apartment, with wonderful furniture and a full-time maid. I don’t want for food, warmth or other comforts. Being the wife of a senior SS officer brings so many privileges, for which I must be grateful. And where you are it must be so difficult. I feel terrible about feeling sorry for myself.

I understand how you will not be able to talk about your circumstances: from what I read, the situation in Stalingrad is difficult and the weather must be dreadful. But I have no doubt whatsoever that right will prevail and the communists will be defeated. I hope that when you finally capture the city there will be a few communists and Jews still alive so you can ensure justice is served upon them.

Spending yesterday on my own has made me resolve to do more in the new year to help other people. Before Christmas there was a talk at the Frauenschaft about a wonderful home the organisation runs in Mecklenburg, where it takes care of the children whose parents have died in the service of the Fatherland.

I have decided to travel there tomorrow and spend a few weeks helping to run the home, which is in the city of Greifswald. You should still write to me at this address: Maria will arrange for any letters to be forwarded to me.

I hope you do not disapprove of my doing this, Karl-Heinrich. I do know your view that a woman should remain at home, but I feel I must do my part in helping to bring about the Ultimate Victory!

With all my fondest love,

Heil Hitler!

Your loving wife,

Sophia