Oliver’s eyes lit up. “That’s why Shockley’s doing funny business behind backs. He’s hoping nobody’ll catch on.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Martinez said. “Decameron would catch on.”

“And that’s why he’s dead!” Oliver said triumphantly. “Him and Leonard and Sparks. Shockley got two in one today.”

“And he popped Leonard because the guy found the cuckoo’s egg?” Martinez shook his head. “B movie, Scotty.”

“Hey, you can’t write it strange enough,” Oliver said. “Can I finish?”

“Go on,” Decker said.

“Shockley realized that Leonard had caught on because Leonard had been acting real nervous. Then when Leonard didn’t show up for work today, Shockley figured he had to be whistle-blowing. Who was Leonard going to drop a dime to first? Decameron, of course.”

Martinez said, “So Shockley went over there and blew them both away. And that’s why Decameron had Bram’s apartment key in his pocket. And that’s why the priest had bloody clothes and shoes in his safe.”

“So what was the priest doing there, hotshot?” Oliver asked.

“Homosexual love triangle,” Martinez said. “All three of them were gay.”

“Leonard had an affair,” Marge said. “With a woman.”

“A quick affair,” Martinez said. “You told us that yourself.”

“That’s also according to Leonard’s ex-mistress,” Marge said. “Maybe it was longer than she was letting on.”

“Or maybe it was quick because Leonard was bad in bed with women.” Martinez thought a moment. “Okay…so maybe he’s bi. Whatever. Suppose the priest was having an affair with Decameron—”

“Yeah, yeah.” Oliver yawned.

“Bram’s key was in Decameron’s pocket—”

Oliver interrupted him. “And Azor Sparks found out about it. He threatened his son and was going to fire Reggie. So Bram or Reggie shot Azor. Then when Bram saw Decameron with another man, he went hog-wild and shot and stabbed them both. Then he tore the place up. Then he took his clothes, stuffed them in his safe along with pincushion porno, and baked cookies for one of his sick parishioners.”

“He did bake cookies,” Decker said. “I’ll be a witness to that.”

“The rest of it stinks,” Oliver said. “Even assuming Bram might have had a reason to bump off Decameron…why would he bump his father? Wasn’t he Daddy’s golden boy?”

“When he behaved himself.” Decker told them the Dana story, how Azor had slammed his son mercilessly for a brief period of time.

Oliver whistled. “God, that’s the type of shit you see on the talk shows. I fucked my twin’s wife. And the guy was still willing to marry her? What a dunce!”

“No wonder he became a priest,” Webster said.

“That all took place years ago,” Marge said. “I can’t see Bram holding a grudge for that long.”

Webster said, “Wouldn’t be a grudge unless y’all held it for a long time.”