“She wasn’t happy. Personally, I think she was real pissed at my dad, though she never expressed it out loud. But you could tell by her coldness. She used to mention to him that one teaches not by harshness but by love, just as Jesus did. You notice that Michael is in medical school. Nothing to rebel against. Because after the whole Dana mess, Dad pretty much butted out of our lives. He was still…Dad. But he kept a lower profile…left family things up to Mom.”

“Did Bram ever forgive Luke?”

“About a year after Bram became ordained, a real peace came over him. He not only forgave Luke, he’s been looking after him for the last six years. It took Luke a long time to get his act in gear. His kids helped. Luke’s a great father, I’ll say that much for him.”

He paused.

“I think I’m a great father, too. Funny, because neither one of us got any role modeling. Dad was never home when we grew up. Bram took over Dad’s role with my younger siblings. But Luke and I were left to our own devices.”

He laughed bitterly.

“We’re also the most screwed-up of the bunch.”

Paul blinked hard.

“I’ve tried very hard to be an involved father. Maybe I’m overinvolved. Because not a day goes by that I don’t think about Angela and the kids. Everything I do, I do for them. Sometimes I think I’d be better off if I were more like my old man—distant, imposing, the boss. ’Cause my kids sure give me crap. But then there are moments. Like when my eight-year-old hit a game-winning three-run homer at Little League. He came running up to me afterward, hugged me in front of his friends, told me he loved me. I guess I did something right.”

Decker nodded, observing a man who had just unloaded a truckload of personal baggage. The outsider in his trio, the son of a brilliant but domineering man. Paul must have been dying to prove himself. Since he couldn’t be brilliant like Dad, nor the golden boy like brother Bram, maybe he could gain his self-respect and position through money.

Hence all the bad investments.

Luke, on the other hand, never even tried. Just drowned his troubles in a a sea of drugs until his kids made him grow up. Yet, Lord only knew how much residual resentment the triplet sons felt toward their father.

Paul checked his watch. “I talk too much. I do that when I’m nervous.”

“You’re nervous around me?”

“My father was murdered and I don’t know why. Right now, I’m nervous around everyone.”

20

“I need to talk to you, Bram. Right away!”

“Shoot.”

“Not over the phone.”