In a way the foolishness of the British working class was also part of God’s great plan to take care of His faithful servants. We were grateful they were not on our beach. We were grateful that they liked the cheap pleasures of a worldly night life, the excitement of the flesh, that they sat in rows on the beach and were jammed into the tiny subdivided rooms in what had once been sumptuous Victorian hotels before they were renovated to accommodate factory workers from Leeds, Luton, and Liverpool. Dad explained that “people like this actually enjoy their lemming-like existence.”

Mom said, “When you’re spiritually empty, you need to always fill up the empty hole only God can fill, and you fill it up with anything that will help you to forget your spiritual emptiness.”

“Like alcohol,” Rachael chimed in.

“Like cigarettes,” I added.

“Yes, dears, that’s right.”

Janet said, “Even noise. That’s why they always have loud worldly music on so they won’t be able to hear God’s still small voice.”

“Why yes, darling, that is absolutely right! That is very perceptive of you,” said Mom.

Rachael shot Janet a murderous glance. All she had thought of was alcohol, and Mom hadn’t thought that “very perceptive.” Janet was supposed to be on Rachael’s side in the battle for control of the airwaves, this talk about loud worldly music in the same breath as empty holes only God can fill was not going to help Rachael in her campaign to be allowed to listen to jazz, with its “worldly savage beat,” on the radio. That was probably why Rachael, who was meek but nevertheless less prudish than Janet, went for broke on this occasion and brought out the heavy artillery, partly to change the subject from the topic of “worldly music” and partly to be just plain ornery and embarrass us all. “But the thing they use most to fill up their lonely and empty spiritual holes is sex, isn’t it, Mom?”

Janet and I glared at Rachael. Now we would get The Talk. Rachael refused to meet our eyes but looked pleased with herself nonetheless.

“Rachael!” bleated Janet.