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Back Platform Seven Save as PDF
Chapters (42)
  1. Cover
  2. Landing Page
  3. Platform Seven
  4. Dedication
  5. Epigraph
  6. Contents
  7. PART ONE
  8. 1
  9. 2
  10. 3
  11. PART TWO
  12. 4
  13. 5
  14. 6
  15. PART THREE
  16. 7
  17. 8
  18. 9
  19. PART FOUR
  20. 10
  21. 11
  22. 12
  23. 13
  24. 14
  25. PART FIVE
  26. 15
  27. 16
  28. 17
  29. PART SIX
  30. 18
  31. 19
  32. 20
  33. PART SEVEN
  34. 21
  35. 22
  36. 23
  37. 24
  38. 25
  39. Acknowledgements
  40. About the Author
  41. By the Same Author
  42. Copyright

He took my chin in one hand and looked at me very lovingly, his grey eyes pouring sympathy and understanding upon me. ‘Don’t you? I know you’re stubborn, Lisa, but really, think about it, give me this one concession. Your whole life, being an only child and everything – I bet you had imaginary friends as well, didn’t you? You’ve always used your imagination and you’ve always thought too much about stuff, you’ve always over-analysed. I’m right, aren’t I?’

I could think of no counter to this argument.

‘You forget, I know you.’ He kissed me lightly on the top of my head and said, ‘Come on, it’s cold, let’s get you home.’

17

I was sleeping badly. I didn’t tell Matty but I thought I might need to see my GP if it went on. I began plotting my visit and where I would hide the pills so that Matty would not see them and then be able to tell me I wasn’t thinking straight because I was tired and disorientated.

*

In early March, I had an epiphany. I was walking home from work, in a light rain, the leaves on the trees wet and the pavement feeling damp and spongy, and it came to me: it wasn’t working, me and Matty. I was unhappy. I would ask him to leave.

I would do it that very evening, I decided, after dinner. I would be calm, and kind – I would be careful. I would tell him everything I admired about him and say how sad I felt because there were so many things about him that were amazing, but the truth was we had moved in together too quickly, it had all been a bit whirlwind and cohabitating so fast had been a mistake. He would argue, of course. Several times he had said, during rows, that if I really felt that way then we should split up, but I had never said it, so he would know I was sincere. He would get angry, perhaps, and tell me I was being ridiculous, oversensitive, paranoid. He would ask me if I was drunk, or tell me I needed professional help. Throughout all of it I would remain calm. It didn’t matter, I would say, whether or not he agreed I had a valid reason to be unhappy – the fact of the matter was that I was unhappy. And I needed some time to work out why and whether it was fixable. I wasn’t saying it was over, I was just saying I wanted him to move out and give me a bit of space.