“Hey, what is it? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Everything. The usual.”

“Stupid question, really.”

I shrug. “Still better to ask it than to not ask at all.”

“You just don’t seem yourself tonight.”

“I could say the same about you,” I retort. “You’ve been so closed off lately, so secretive. If you’re having second thoughts about us, James, you only need to say. I don’t want you to stay with me out of pity, or because you feel like you have to.”

“I don’t feel like that at all.” He frowns, genuinely puzzled. “Is that what you think? That I’ve fallen out of love with you?”

“I don’t know what to think.” I wipe my tears on the back of one hand.

He sighs. “Sit.”

“No. If you have something bad to say I’d rather hear it standing.”

“Please.” He sits down himself and tugs at my hand. I let myself fall carefully, until I am settled between his legs, my back nestled in against his chest. He rubs his face softly against the side of my head, his lips kissing my hair softly, and his words when he speaks are clear and unmistakable.

“I love you, Ava. That hasn’t changed, nor will it ever.”

“But something is on your mind, isn’t it?”

“Yes. But not what you’re thinking.”

“Then tell me.”

“OK, but it has to stay between us. It’s all hush-hush at the moment. My friend, Henry. He’s an award-winning journalist, but more than just your average one. He’s like a kind of modern-day explorer, like Cook, or Columbus. He seeks out the unknown, or as yet undiscovered. About six months ago he found a previously unknown civilization deep in the South American jungle. They are as primitive as it gets, and he was very nearly killed and probably would have been eaten for dinner. But somehow—and I don’t know how he does it but he has this effect on most people he meets—he won them over enough that they let him stay with them for a time, observing their ways.”

“Wow, that’s…pretty amazing.”

“It really is. They live their entire lives hundreds of feet above the ground, in huts built into the canopy of the trees, all interconnected and pretty well camouflaged. They have their own system of catching rainwater and everything, and they only go down to the ground to hunt for food.”

His voice grows more animated as he talks, and I realize what’s coming.

“He wants you to go back with him,” I say quietly, cutting him off mid-speech.

He is silent for a moment and then he speaks quietly. “He does.”

“You want to go.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.” His voice grows harsh. “Not now. Not while you’re still…”

I sit forward, angry. “That’s unfair. I can’t be the thing that stops you from living your life.”

“Ava. Look at me.”

Reluctantly, I turn my head to look over my shoulder.

“You are my life.” His voice is raspy. “I’m not going. I’ve already told him that. He is looking for someone else.”