It was disgusting, and a disgrace, but prevention wasn’t easy. If you banned overnight stays then the council was faced with the difficulty of enforcement, and the same problem would emerge elsewhere in the town. If you provided toilets then there would be a demand for a shower block and further amenities in what was a park, not a camping ground, all putting pressure on rates. However, Pearly understood that it was little use talking of the bigger picture to the women before him. They had a valid grievance from a limited perspective and expected him to Do Something. Doing Something was what people wanted of their mayor: solving the problems within a small jurisdiction. Even as Pearly assured the delegation that he would look into the issue — Looking Into It was also a mayoral responsibility — he was wryly aware of the bathos involved. Pearly Gates, mayor and lead citizen, in solemn discussion concerning yobbos shitting among the pine trees of a run-down waterside park. And who was he to sit in judgement? He recalled rugby trips of years ago when the returning bus would stop by a rural windbreak and half the team would pile out to relieve themselves in a variety of ways. Good for the soil, someone would say cheerfully. But residential areas were different, weren’t they, Pearly reassured himself. And the times different too.

‘I understand your concern,’ Pearly said. ‘It’s a growing problem nationwide and not just in urban areas, and we on council—’

‘Dog poop is bad enough,’ interrupted Amy, the white goose rising from her lap briefly in emphasis. ‘More and more of them and hardly any on a leash.’

‘Hardly any,’ repeated Elaine dutifully.

‘I’ll have a word with those in the relevant department.’ Pearly was beginning to find the conversation tiresome.

‘We think it should be definitely brought before the full council,’ said Amy. Elaine couldn’t quite bring herself to second such temerity.

‘I think not at this stage,’ said Pearly firmly. ‘But thank you both for bringing your concerns to me. It’s always good to see local householders taking a constructive interest in their area. The harbour precinct and suburb are well known to me through my work as a real estate agent, as well as council matters.’ And Pearly flattered the two women by extolling their locality, listened with apparent absorption to their response, then stood up to show it was time for them to leave. He went to the door with them, gave them each a council calendar from a stack at hand, thanked them again. ‘What a nasty wind today,’ he said. His final remarks to Amy Ransumeen were a compliment on her handbag, and so she was wrong-footed and went away mollified to some extent despite herself.