“No, thank you.” I felt a smile somewhere deep in me, but it didn’t make it to my lips.

Back outside, I found the minivan and got in, leaving the slider open so I didn’t get cooked. My weather app said it was eighty degrees, but it felt hotter than what eighty felt like in Long Beach, maybe because it was a lot drier here and closer to the sun. I wondered how fast the stripe of sunlight across my right knee would take to sunburn as I looked around the parking lot, unsettled.

Everything about being here again without Colette felt . . . wrong.

There was a park across the street from the general store, with benches under some fluffy green trees in front of a pond. It looked a lot better than sitting in a hot car, and I was antsy—I needed to move. I texted Uncle Bran that I was going over, and he replied that he’d text when they were checking out.

I crossed at the light and walked into the park, sitting tentatively on the edge of one of the benches. I realized that the park was bigger than I’d thought: the pond and path stretched pretty far away from the street into a more wooded area. A few people were walking dogs or jogging on the path, disappearing into the trees, then reemerging out the other side.

There was a group of kids about my age messing around on scooters, trying to flip them over their heads and stuff. One of the kids noticed me, so I got up and started walking on the path, moving away from them.

I didn’t want to be noticed.

I felt like I was being watched until the path curved into the cluster of trees. I couldn’t see the road or the general store anymore—and people over there couldn’t see me. As I checked my phone to make sure I hadn’t missed a text from Uncle Bran, a breeze tickled the hairs on my arms and made me shiver. Maybe the walk would have been nice if my brain had shut up.

What if I get attacked by a bear and no one helps me?

What if I get stung by a bee and that’s when I realize I’m allergic to them?

What if I die and no one has any idea where I am? Just like no one knew where Colette was after she fell into a ravine.

A jogger startled me, appearing from around the bend. I kept my head down as he ran by, picturing him suddenly turning around and strangling me.

You really are mental, said the mean voice in my head.