My mother had been worried about me when I joined the army. My position with Gibraltar Trading soothed her nerves considerably. My father’s reaction was quite unexpected: a mixture of amusement and appreciation. He seemed to know exactly what I was up to. And our relationship actually improved. We began to have long conversations—philosophical in nature. I discovered a whole new side of him. In short, he opened up to me, taking an interest in me as he never had before—or at least, not since before university, when it became clear that I was never going to be a scientist. I knew that had disappointed him, though he never voiced it and never showed it. Like all parents, he just wanted me to value the things he valued. In some way, he wanted me to carry on his work.

When I visited home from my trips, I brought small trinkets, which my mother displayed in the parlor and my father placed on shelves in his study. He asked me about the trips with an amused look on his face, as if he knew what had truly taken place.

On Easter weekend in 1965, I learned just how much he knew.

I sat in his study, completely unprepared for what he was about to tell me.

“I’d like you to come with me to Hong Kong next week.”

“Can’t. I have a meeting with a new client in Warsaw.”

He stood, walked to a shelf to the left of his desk, and moved a few items out of the way. He pushed the shelf’s back panel; it clicked and sprang open, revealing a small safe, which he opened. He drew out a picture and handed it to me.

“Twenty years ago, I helped create that device.”

I had seen the image before, many times. This was a photo—an original, printed by someone who was there at the first atomic bomb test. I had never known Father was involved.

“I have regretted it every day since. Do you know how many nuclear warheads exist today?”

Still studying the picture, I said. “Thirty-seven thousand, seven hundred and forty-one. Give or take.”

“And they’re far more powerful than the ones dropped on Japan.”

He paused, waited for me to look at him.

“Communism isn’t humanity’s greatest enemy. Indeed, we are the greatest enemy we now face. For the first time in history, we have the means with which to destroy ourselves. I helped give that deadly weapon to the world. I’ve spent the years since trying to ensure it is never used again.”

“How?”

“I’m part of an organization that’s creating a new device, a device that will change the human race. Its reach will be unlimited. It will affect every person, of every nationality and race and religion. It will save us. It may well be our only chance of survival.”