But Kathy was insistent, so I told her I’d go for a short time. The event ended up being more fun than I’d expected. A group of friends flocked over, and we had a whole table to ourselves, and they even served some wine, which was rare. The time flew, and I ended up winning the final game of the night, which was the big jackpot.

I couldn’t believe it. I’d never won anything in my life. And two thousand dollars was a huge amount of money for us at the time. I remember how excited I was to tell Jack. I decided not to text or call but to surprise him when I got home. We’d make plans to go out to a fancy dinner with Francesca to celebrate. I drove home singing to Justin Timberlake, who seemed like such a nice boy with an amazing voice, and was surprised when I walked in and saw there were no dishes in the sink and the television wasn’t on. Jack had never washed a dish in his life and I didn’t expect him to start now, so that meant he hadn’t eaten dinner. Had he gone to bed already?

I walked up the stairs and found him dead on the carpeted floor of our bedroom.

Nothing was out of place. No phone by his side to call 911. He was dressed in his normal outfit of loose khaki pants and a white shirt. His face didn’t reflect any distress or regret or pain. It was just smooth and expressionless.

And gone.

Jack was no longer in there. The body had been just a shell after all. And as I called 911 and felt the hysterics begin deep in my bones, the full horror unfolding over losing the man I’d been with for my entire life, I wondered, if I hadn’t stayed for bingo, would he still be alive?

I never told Frannie about the money or being at bingo. I donated the funds back to the church and buried the knowledge deep. But right now, walking into the hospital to see my daughter, I couldn’t stop wondering whether one bad decision can wreck the rest of one’s life. If I’d come home from mass, maybe I could have saved my husband, and then maybe Frannie wouldn’t have collapsed at forty-eight years old.

Men plan and God laughs, the familiar voice whispered. Why are you still obsessing about that? You should have never donated the damn money. You could have used it.

Shush, I told Jack, hurrying my steps to the nurse’s desk. It was blood money. I didn’t want it.

You’ve been watching too many old movies on TCM. It was from church bingo and it wasn’t your fault.