I couldn’t stand it. A cry escaped my lips and I moved to the other bed, pulling her into my arms. The fresh smell of her shampoo filled my nose, and her thin, muscled body fit against mine, notched right by my heart. Tears stung my eyes and I uttered the words in her ear with a fierceness that burned from my soul. “Allegra, you make me happy every day. When I get up and see your face, I realize how beautiful this world is. You are imprinted into my soul. I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I lost my way. I thought you needed plenty of time and space to grow, but instead, it just became easier to leave you alone than fight through. It’s not because I don’t care. I just made a mistake, and I want to fix it. It’s not too late if you give me another chance, and this time, I won’t break your trust. I swear to God, I won’t.”

I hugged her harder, and she pressed her face against my shoulder and shuddered. She let me hold her for a long time, and when she finally pulled away, there was a kernel of hope glowing in her brown eyes. She swiped hard at her nose. “I know I’ve been a bitch too. It’s just hard. All of it. I get so mad at you, and it’s like I can’t do anything about it because you’re not here.”

“I know. It’s going to change. We’re going to fight, probably a lot, but I won’t be disappearing. I realized over this tour, it became a habit to just ignore things because I was so afraid to argue. I need to get over that. I’m not perfect, Allegra. This motherhood thing doesn’t come with a manual, but I love you more than anything. And I still have a company to run and work that I love, but I won’t let it take over my entire world. I learned a few things in these past three weeks also.”

She sniffed. “Me too. I think I have real feelings for Ian, Mom. I want to be all cool and pretend it’s no big deal that he’s going to leave forever, but I’m really sick inside. And I wish he didn’t have to be a priest. Isn’t that awful?”

“No, it’s not. I don’t want Enzo to be a tour guide and live in Italy. Why did we have to fall for two men who are completely unobtainable?”