I replied with, ‘You’re the one making Australia look bad,’ and then turned away from him and took a sip of the crappy wine. My heart was beating very fast, but I was glad I’d said something. People like that should not travel. They should stay the fuck home. At least they paid their bill.

‘Impressive,’ said Gary, looking at me as though seeing me in a new light.

Marie was laughing. ‘That was brilliant. I don’t know if I could have done that.’

‘I thought I might have to fight the guy,’ said Josh, winking at me.

‘You could have taken that middle-aged guy,’ I replied.

‘Hey now – no derogatory talk about the middle-aged. Especially as I am well within that demographic,’ added Marie.

‘You’re not middle-aged,’ I retorted.

‘Well, depends how you define it. If I live ’til I’m eighty, then I’m more than halfway. Doesn’t that make me middle-aged?’

Uh oh. I back-pedalled – vigorously. ‘Middle age is less about actual age in my mind – I think of it as a term to describe a mentality – like the word ‘youthful’. I mean, my parents are in their sixties, but I don’t even think of them as middle-aged – they’re youthful people. They’re vibrant and adventurous. Like you, Marie.’ I really hoped I hadn’t insulted her. I looked at her with a hopeful smile.

She laughed – probably more at me than with me. ‘I get what you’re saying. I like the concept – I might steal it to describe myself from now on. I am forty-eight years young!’

At hearing her age, Josh looked a little shocked and caught my eye. I nodded slightly as if to say, ‘Doesn’t she seem much younger?’ He surreptitiously checked Marie out while she and Gary shared a moment and with his own slight nod, Josh agreed with me.

The waiter – the same officious one who had served us earlier – appeared at our side with a smile on his face and a carafe of wine. ‘Hello, this is for you and your friends. That man was very rude, and I am thankful for you, for your help.’

Well, I hadn’t expected that. ‘Oh, you’re welcome.’

He signalled to the wine, said, ‘Enjoy,’ and then went back inside.

‘How thoughtful of him,’ said Marie as she poured the wine into glasses.

I was about to say I’d had enough crappy wine when Gary took a sip and said, ‘Oh, wow. This isn’t half bad. I think he broke out the good stuff!’

The three of us took sips and agreed. ‘To the good stuff,’ I toasted, holding my glass aloft. There were clinks all around, and we finished our meal on an even better note than we’d begun it.

We walked back to the boat in our pairs. It had been a fun dinner, even though the meal itself paled in comparison with lunch.

‘Tired?’ asked Josh.