She felt quite useless. Her life as she knew it was like a mirage that was growing hazier by the hour. Trust was a fragile thing, she’d learned that as a child, and she knew that even if she could prove her innocence to Matt, there would still be an element of suspicion in his mind. Because she’d lied to him, hadn’t she? She’d lied about the money, her deal with James, and who she was with at the weekend. Lie upon lie. And even though everything had been innocent and above board with James, Matt wouldn’t believe her. Not now he’d seen the video. And then, in the future, he’d question everything she said.

My marriage is over. The realisation thumped her in the chest, taking her breath away. And it’s my own fault. One stupid decision had caused her life to fall apart, and she had no idea how to repair it.

There was no going back. She could only go forward, but where she was headed was shrouded in darkness and she was stumbling like a drunkard. It’s not about who trusts me, she told herself. The future depends on who I choose to trust. She glanced at James, on the surface a benevolent presence in her life. But can I be sure what’s really going on?

He caught her eye. ‘Let me ask you this, Sara. What do you want to happen now?’

She clasped her mug a little tighter. I want my life to go back to the way it was before I got this stupid job. Everything had been fine then. More or less. She pulled at that thought, unravelled it a little to find the truth. It hadn’t been completely fine, though, had it? Otherwise she wouldn’t have been yearning for a job, needing to scratch that itch to get out of the house, do something different, use her brain. She’d lost her focus, let it drift away from the most important people in her life – her family. Her needs could wait. There’d be time for her when the kids left home. Why didn’t I see that? This situation was a result of her impatience, her dissatisfaction with her lot, always wanting what others had, like Hailey had said. In that moment, she hated herself with a passion.

‘Sara?’

She’d forgotten James had asked her a question, but now she was very clear about her answer.