How does someone go from obsession to disinterest so instantaneously?

I wish I could be like him. I wish I could just switch everything off inside of me, but I can’t. Something changed the moment he told me I was free. I don’t know what it was, but instead of pushing him from my thoughts, my psyche has become consumed by him.

He’s all I can think about, all I dream about. Him giving up his obsession has created an obsession in me and I hate it. I want to forget him, but he’s always there at the back of my mind. I know I should leave, that being here in this house is only fueling my madness, but leaving now feels impossible.

When I was trapped here all I wanted was to escape, but now I’m free, I just don’t seem to be able to walk away.

How dare he be so disinterested that he can’t even be bothered to look in my direction. He ruined me, haunted my waking and sleeping hours and now I’m not worth a single glance. A fucking bottle of beer is more interesting. Then there was that moment when he stopped my bottle from hitting the ground and he was so close to me. Close enough that I could feel the heat of his breath on my cheek. I thought he would kiss me, that he’d do what he always does and overwhelm my body with his touch, but instead he stepped back. He was inches from me and instead of putting his hands on me, he treated me like I was a stranger he was offering his seat to on the bus.

He stepped back. Just moved, like being that close to me didn’t bother him at all. I want to scream, to stomp back downstairs and punch him in his stupid beautiful face, because how dare he ruin me and now not even care?

Agreeing to have dinner with them all is reckless, but the smell of the food Hunter has been cooking each night has been driving me a little crazy after eating the tasteless collection of food they serve in the cafeteria. The burgers and sandwiches aren’t too bad, but the evening meals are just so damn bland I’m at risk of dehydrating from all the salt I’m having to douse my food in. You’d think at a school where the tuition fees are more than the average American makes in five years, the food would be practically Michelin starred, but apparently cafeteria food is cafeteria food no matter where it's made.

My skin feels tight as I strip out of my jeans and tank and step under the cold water of my shower. I’m crazy, he’s making me feel crazy and I hate it. The need to run claws at my throat, so I haphazardly blot the water from my skin, pull on my tight running shorts and a sports bra, then grab my sneakers and armband before stomping downstairs and out of the front door.