But because this office runs on healthy discourse, on a back-and-forth of shared vulnerabilities. Your ability to share your personal life with us is a litmus test of your commitment to the larger mission statement here. We want to connect. We want to provoke. We want to know what it was about your girlfriend that made you pause for a moment and wish she’d just get it together and sort it out. What was that thing?

SAM. I can’t think of anything.

MIRANDA. You can.

SAM. Honestly I can’t.

MIRANDA. One thing.

SAM. There wasn’t.

MIRANDA. One thing about your girlfriend that physically repulsed you.

SAM. If there was something, I’d tell you but –

MIRANDA. Was your girlfriend a supermodel?

SAM. What?

MIRANDA. Was your girlfriend a supermodel?

SAM. No.

MIRANDA. Your girlfriend was not a supermodel.

SAM. No she was a. She was a chef, a / sous chef, she preps the veg –

MIRANDA. The only way she could have been physically flawless is if she was a supermodel, and you’re saying to me she was not a supermodel, so a priori, there must be something.

And frankly, I’ve met Naomi Campbell, and even there, you wouldn’t believe the crow’s feet on it so.

She laughs.

Sorry. I’m being silly now, that’s me, you’ll get to know my sense of humour.

SAM. I can’t think of anything. I’m sorry.

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