‘Lorna, shut up. I’m stressed enough as it is. If you keep this up, you and I are finished. I mean it. Show some respect.’

I followed Michael to a smashed-out archway propped up with scaffold. It led to a wooden spiral staircase held up by more metal poles.

‘This is your bedroom.’ Michael pushed me into a round room with bare plaster on the ceiling and a mattress on the floor. ‘I had them do it out in your style so you’d feel right at home. Not that you deserve it right now, the way you’re acting.’

The room was small and smelt of paint. Two walls were patchy with careless black paint strokes. A paint can and petrified brush sat in the corner, like someone was coming back to finish the job.

‘What’s my style? Train wreck?’

‘Hey.’ Michael took both my hands and gave me his signature whirlpool eye stare. ‘There are new things for you in the wardrobe.’ He opened a wonky cupboard, also painted a patchy black. Inside were packages of underwear – fishnet tights, suspender belts, red lace bras, all stacked up.

‘So, what? I wait here and dress in underwear while you entertain your wife downstairs?’

‘You’re not a girl who likes to upset people, right? Diane’s been through enough. She dreamed of a simple married life and it’s all come tumbling down. Have a heart. Stay here. Just stay put, okay. You’re my number-one girl.’

‘Michael—’

Michael put a heavy hand on my shoulder. ‘Listen. When you’re staying at my house, you follow my rules. I’m lord of the manor here. There can only be one lord, okay? And you’re the princess. I lead, you follow. Everything is better that way. Count your blessings.’

‘And if I don’t?’

Michael did that angry, shoulder-hunching thing. ‘Then get out of here, Lorna. Go back to your crap little life. And don’t expect anything from me, ever again.’

Michael left then, slamming the door.

I went to the window, tears forming. I would leave. I’d walk right out the door and through the woods and …

It took about three seconds to understand the practical reality: I was in the middle of nowhere with no car, no friends and no money. But more than that – I didn’t know how to be without Michael. Whenever he left me alone, I felt empty. Lost. Sad. My life now was spent waiting for him.

Back then, I was certain I would never be happy without Michael in my life. He was the only thing that made the sadness go away. I didn’t realize that, like any drug, Michael caused both the sadness and the happiness.

I sank to the black-painted floorboards and cried into my knees.