Back My Spare Heart Save as PDF

‘I sometimes have a smoke, but not really when my parents are around,’ I told them.

‘Don’t worry about them,’ Caroline said. ‘Friday nights when they’re having a drink is the best time to have a good time. Really, they want us to stay away from them so we don’t see them get trashed.’ She dug through her toiletries bag and pulled out a little bottle of eyedrops. ‘I’ve got Clear Eyes.’

‘Great,’ Ashley said, passing the joint back to Caroline and then putting in some of the eyedrops.

‘Are you sure?’ Caroline asked, holding in the smoke and offering the joint to me again.

‘Later,’ I said, although there was no way I wanted to get high later either. And I knew that I’d have to make another excuse when Caroline tried to offer me a drink.

‘Parents’ parties are fun, hey Ashley?’

‘Yep,’ she said. ‘They all drive to the party thinking they’ll only have one or two drinks, and they end up getting into it and then hope someone sober turns up who can drop them home, or they catch an Uber. They’re happy, we’re happy, everyone’s happy.’

I thought about some of the parties that Dad and Mum used to have. Sure, Mum would have a lot to drink and a good time, but it wasn’t like my friends and I were smoking joints in the bathroom and drinking their alcohol.

Caroline sprayed some deodorant around the bathroom and then we sat back on her bed. She put on some music that kind of sounded like the old rock music she likes, but more electronic. I checked my Shazam app – Tame Impala.

‘What’s going on, Ash?’ Caroline said.

‘Nothing,’ she replied, before starting to giggle.

Caroline started giggling too. ‘Oh that weed is so good.’

‘I need a drink,’ Ashley said, licking her lips in a funny way.

‘Water or wine?’ Caroline asked.

‘Water then wine.’ Ashley jumped up from the bed and poured herself some water from the bathroom faucet. ‘That’s better,’ she said as she sipped.

‘How long have your parents been making wine?’ I asked Caroline.

‘This place used to be my nonno’s,’ she said.

‘Is he still alive?’

‘Yeah, he lives in Port Lincoln now. He likes fishing. He gave this place to Mum and Dad before I was born.’

‘That’s cool,’ I said, feeling a bit more relaxed now that I couldn’t smell anymore smoke and the lingering deodorant. As long as I’m not high and drunk, everything is fine, I told myself. And really, apart from giggling a bit, Caroline and Ashley seemed normal, talking about bands, films and stuff on Netflix, pretty much like Jane and Katie do.

I felt my phone buzz with a message.

Caitlin: We’re about to leave.

‘Got to say bye to the olds,’ I told Caroline and Ashley before I walked out of the room.

I wondered if I should head home with Dad and Caitlin, but it would be rude – I’d only just got there – and Caroline didn’t seem to mind too much that I wasn’t joining in with her and Ashley. I trusted myself to resist temptation.