“You remember him as a grandfather, and that’s quite enough for you, but as a son I always wilted in his shadow. He seemed so much larger than life, and I never quite lived up to his model of leadership. I was too much in my head, too much in my books. I wasn’t quick or decisive. I took time to ponder, to weigh, to measure.”

“All the things I don’t do?”

“All the things he didn’t do. It made me feel rather inadequate by comparison, and when he passed, I felt so unprepared to assume his place that I gave serious thought to abdication.”

“No.”

“I did,” he said plainly. “I met with three different solicitors, which is why I know how muddy your own inheritance situation is.”

“I assumed you’d done the research on my behalf.”

“Perhaps a better father would have, and even I would have eventually, but at first I couldn’t see past my own fear. Even after I learned how hard it would be to separate our family from the title, or the title from our ownings, I still may’ve tossed it all and run if not for your mother’s steady hand.”

Victoria’s stomach clenched at the mention of her mother, but her father continued in his soothing voice.

“She took to her role much better than I. She had even less preparation, but she possessed an iron will and a determination to learn. She made some early blunders, and the press was unrelenting in their criticism, but she refused to be cowed by it. She merely rededicated herself time and time again. She became an expert hostess and studied everything from state protocol to land management laws. Mostly, though, she studied people. She could examine situations I’d taken for granted my whole life and immediately discern all the hidden power dynamics.”

“That’s not surprising,” Vic said dryly.

“She became my confidante and my most trusted advisor. She challenged me to be better without making me feel incompetent. Slowly we developed a partnership that spoke to each of our strengths and public images.”

There was the whole public image concept again to pile on her current state of crisis. There was no getting around how essential the concept was to their way of life.

“Because of her I never actually had to learn how to be a duke in my own right, at least not as a stand-alone. From the day I ascended to the title I was merely half of the Duke and Duchess of Northland. I was part of a pair, a unit, indivisible. Looking back now, I realise the only real decision I ever had to make on my own was the one to marry your mother.”

Her chest ached again. “You were very lucky to be able to make that decision for yourself.”