Sweaty and vigorous workouts like jogging or gymming were not to Anu’s liking. She was not big into dieting either. What was life without eating what you liked? Then YouTube had thrown the word Keto diet at her repeatedly and it sounded good. All you can eat is fat! But unfortunately, that didn’t work for her either. All that butter, cheese and paneer had got her South Indian gut into a tizzy.

On one lazy YouTube-browsing day, Anu misspelt ‘Keto’ as ‘Keno’ and stumbled upon a waif-like woman bending her body aesthetically while explaining the poses in a beautiful accent. Video after video of the Keno woman, along with hundred other perfectly toned Yoginis (including Shilpa Shetty with a wide grin) propounding Yoga had left Anu mesmerized. And she had begun right away, pulling up Keno on the Smart TV screen. After a week of practising with Keno on YouTube, Anu asked Shwetha to video her poses. To Anu’s horror, she was like an antonym to Keno. Keno’s Triangle pose was Anu’s Slouched duck. Keno’s Lotus bend was Anu’s topple-to-the-ground pose. Shwetha’s uncontrolled laughter had not help the matter. Shwetha still had the video just as a way to blackmail Anu someday.

Giving up on YouTube tutoring, Anu joined a class. A guru was what she needed. Someone who gently corrected her and made her body supple and toned, like Keno’s. But, the forty-something lithe instructor turned out to be a monster in a white kurta. He shamed people in the most ingenious ways if their bodies did not bend to his will. A few examples of his insults being: ‘You can audition for the role a hunchback’; or, ‘Your arms are so jiggly, they can double as wings.’ His favourite for Anu was, ‘I said touch your toes, not look at them.’ Anu still shuddered at the thought of him. She had stuck on for three months. But after yet again being reprimanded for not holding the toes with her teeth and rubbing the face on the ground, or some such impossible thing, she had quit. He was ruining her zen instead of adding to it.

But Anu hadn’t given up her hunt for a gently-correcting-guru. She tried another place, but here the instructor made them meditate more and bend less. Anu ended up dozing off through the entire class. After that, there were a few more disappointments. One, where the entire class was a thousand Surya Namaskaras, another, mostly talks on Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras.

Then, at last, her prayers were answered! A year ago, this extremely gentle woman, Supriyaji, had moved into their apartment complex and sent out an email about starting classes. Anu was the first one to visit her. And, it was love at first sight. Supriyaji was oh-so-perfect. Anu’s dream gently-correcting-guru. Anu felt like Buddha inside and Keno outside after the class.