‘Can there be any doubt about it, my friend? To my regret, to my regret! Business is bad; I have no choice. But who will suffer from it the most? Certainly not you. As I say, you’re probably delighted. From now on you can abandon yourself to your literary labours and forget the rest of the world — but what about me? Who will compensate me for the loss of your precious company? You’ll forget Dr Kreindel in a jiffy, I promise you, from the hair on his head to the boil on his bum, in the words of the popular saying, hee-hee … Vanished into the blue, as far as you’re concerned! But it will be a long, long time before I forget the inspiration of the profound intellectual discussions we held in this office, believe me! Drawing on that wellspring of divine abundance … et cetera, et cetera … who said it? Schiller, I believe … I can’t remember at the moment. You see, the strength of my emotions is affecting my memory … Yes. To get back to the subject, I have to praise you to your face, my dear Herr Gurdweill: there isn’t another man in the world to whom I could speak so frankly, so intimately, as you. Can you deny it? Intelligent people don’t grow on trees, you know. One or two in a generation — and that’s it! Intelligent, I mean, like you and me … Imagine my sorrow at the thought of losing you …’

‘And how long, for example, my noble, intellectual friend, can you go on … talking like this?’

‘Me? As long as you can go on … keeping quiet like this, hee-hee! Friends have to express their feelings before they part, you know, and if the one is too modest to say anything, the other is obliged to speak for both … When you stop working here, you won’t want to waste your precious time on coming here to have a little chat with poor Dr Kreindel, will you? Admit it! And when will I ever have the chance to enjoy your charming company again? Only now, when the hour of parting approaches, can I begin to estimate the depths of my attachment to you … As for yours to me — it’s scarcely the same thing, is it? Don’t deny it, one feels such things immediately! Why, it’s just like an unhappy love affair, with one party dying of love and the other smiling scornfully, feeling nothing but pity and impatience. In our case, I’m afraid, the unhappy lover is me …’