Emily let the silence stretch, until Lucky was ready to say: ‘After the Third of April I felt swallowed up, I felt fury, futility, defeat. Everyone in my restaurant, except Sophia, dead in a pool of blood while I was at home watching Wheel of Fortune. It undid me. The chaos in the world got to me and left me unhinged and the gambling was the result of that sadness and self-loathing. Gambling was a final investment in life—a preparation for death. I thought that when I got to the end of my money, that would be the end of my story and the end of my unhappiness. I realise this sounds crazy. I could have done other things with that money rather than waste it, self-harm with it. I could have given the money to someone in need.’

‘Who would you give the money to now, if you could?’

‘I should nominate millions of people, billions. But among the people I know, it would be Sophia. She’s important, she and her kid. They’re part of my story, but I don’t see them much. Sophia was in a bad way after the Third of April and now she’s out of work, and she and her son are leaving their rental and moving in with a friend. They’re waiting for public housing. I called and gave her your number, like I promised. She might contact you.’

‘Thank you.’

‘Then again, she might not call you.’

‘I don’t want to coerce anyone into speaking. I want full consent. She was traumatised; I wasn’t. If she’s not comfortable, I’m not comfortable.’

‘I told Sophia I trusted you completely.’

‘How long was gambling a problem?’

‘Five years, maybe, before I got help. In that time I spent the money from the restaurant sale. Then I used my house as collateral. There were days when I told myself the truth: if I kept going I’d eventually lose everything. And I told myself that when I was finally broke I’d go home and swallow something and die. That’s one solution to a gambling problem. But when I was finally broke I decided I didn’t want to kill myself. Instead I want to resurrect the franchise: I’m still in the game. My head is still in the restaurant world. Haven’t got the money together yet.’

‘I want to ask you about Henry. You saw him on the Third of April.’

‘You know the facts of it.’

‘He came to your house that day. Before he went to the restaurant.’

‘I don’t know why he didn’t kill me. No one can answer that question.’

‘What did he say when he knocked on your door?’

‘We’ve talked about gambling. Let’s stick to one disaster per day.’