Ever since I’d come back from the dead—I’d never get used to saying that—it was as if there was a thin sheet of film between us. I could get close, but never close enough, and I wasn’t satisfied with the innocent cuddles and touches. Cair was distancing himself, somewhat, never truly letting his guard down, even when we were alone. On more than one occasion I’d sensed his desire and the flare of his possessive instincts, but each time, despite my eagerness, he’d stifled it, clenching his fists and willing away the hunger. He’d even leave the room whenever I fell asleep, like he couldn’t stand being beside me all night.

At first, it was probably because he didn’t want me wasting my energy on anything other than healing, so he took himself out of the equation to be a gentleman. Which, understandable and appreciated. But it had been over a week, and though I was still a little unsteady on my feet, I felt physically and mentally fine. He’d tried indulging me where he could, with chaste kisses and caresses, words of praise, but those reassurances seemed rehearsed in comparison to what he used to shower me with, and it would never cross the line into sex.

Which was what I was missing.

It wasn’t even about the act itself, but more so the intimacy, the togetherness. The love. I needed to be one with my mate, to go back to how we were before and feel the chemistry that used to be so easy for us. I needed to feel wanted by him in every way, to feel the proof that we were as unbreakable as I believed we were, but he wouldn’t take that leap. It was hard to ignore.

I’d wondered if the temporary snap in our bond had shaken our foundations, stripped everything bare, and naturally, created a slight drift. Or was it deeper than that? Had Cair finally come to the realization that being my mate was too much of an inconvenience? That I was too much of a liability, too dependent? It would explain his reluctance, the emotional avoidance, and his faraway stare whenever he looked at me now, but… no. No, he’d never think that, and I had to stop wandering down those dark, never-ending paths.

He loved and adored me more than anything, he cherished the ground I walked on, and I could still feel it even without the physical proof.

Couldn’t I?

“What’s troubling you, sweetheart?” Cair asked, concern creasing his brow. “Is the water too cold?”