Dearest Molly,

I know what I’m doing is wrong, and I hope there will come a day when you will find it in your heart to forgive me.

For too many years, I’ve been your father’s dogsbody.

Not a day has gone by when he hasn’t proved how little he cares for me. I’m a convenience to him, and that’s all I’ll ever be. It’s too late for him to change now, and besides, somewhere along the way I’ve changed. I’m not the young girl he wed. I’m a woman, with a woman’s feelings. I’ve got a right to some respect and consideration. I’ve borne his children and taken his abuse, and now the only feelings I have for him are anger and disgust.

The thing is, I’ve been offered a new life with the gentle, caring man I knew in my youth, and who is now back in my life. At first I turned him away, because he didn’t want to be burdened with another man’s children. But now, being in here and having the time to think, I know I have to go with him. If I don’t, I shall regret it for the rest of my life.

I had all but decided I could never leave you and the children, but then I realised, one day, when you all fly the nest, I’ll be left alone with only your father for company. The thought fills me with dread.

It was your father who forced the decision when he came to the hospital last night. Drunk and full of himself as usual, he tried to take liberties with me, until someone called the sister, and he was escorted from the premises. As you can imagine, he screamed and cursed all the way out, so everybody could see and hear. Oh, Molly! He makes me so ashamed.

I know my going will put a terrible burden on your head. I pray to God you can forgive me for that. But you’re young, Molly, with your whole life in front of you. You can afford to wait a few years, until the children are older. The best part of my life is gone, and I don’t know if I could spend another day with your father, let alone years on end.

Please, try to understand. I can’t go on the way things are. If I stayed, I believe I would end it all.

We will go a long way away, where no one will ever find us in this world. So it will be of no use for anyone to try to trace us.

Please forgive me, and let me go with your blessing.

I will always love you. Wish me well, lass.

Goodbye then, Molly. Don’t hate me.

Your Mammy.

XXX

After writing the letter, Amy folded it into the envelope and addressed it: For Molly Tattersall (Amy Tattersall’s daughter), then she sealed it down.

The letter was for Molly’s eyes only; not for those who could never understand how a mother could leave her children. They didn’t know how it was, how a man like Frank could drive you to despair. In those few moments an endless procession of shocking scenes paraded through her mind. Of how he had spent his wages too often at the pub and the betting shop, leaving her to scrape by on what she could muster. Scenes of him drunk, and violent, and of how he would use her in the bedroom like she was a woman off the streets, and nearby her children listening to every ugly sound.