She was pulled to her knees and her anus took the fingers of the other man while the cock entered her from behind, first pummelling her vagina for what seemed an agonising period of minutes and then pulled out as the man who was not inside her rammed his cock into her mouth; she gagged and then took it, as if weak and numbed into submission; the inevitable extra thrust on removal from the vagina caused a visible cry of pain, although no sound could be heard as her anus took the cock.

The man convulsed as his load entered her.

The other man pulled his cock from her mouth; as she collapsed onto the bed his sperm was forced onto her face and he rubbed it all over her face and then pissed on her slumped body.

She was out cold and both men, you could see, thought they had done a good job.

The woman on the bed didn’t move, but the woman in the room did and turned on the lights and switched off the projector.

That was her movie.

One fifteen-minute stag movie as they were called and shown in private clubs. And that, at the time, 1964, was about as hardcore as they got. Lomita sat in the dimmed light, and she sat and sat.

She had not watched the movie for many years, but now looked at it barely recognising that it was her. Her objectivity allowed her to remember the circumstances with a clarity that she had been unable to face for most of her years.

She wanted it to help Ever. She could recognise a track that he was on that would eventually destroy the life that he already felt was destroyed, but my God he knew nothing, he was a child with a distortion, he knew nothing, she felt that she could make him know something and make him understand that life is full of consequences. Life is one giant consequence and she would like him to know that, but she didn’t know if she would ever see him again. Maybe it was all too late and he had already done that which would determine his life: maybe she was wasting her time because maybe he didn’t care.

At this particular moment he most certainly didn’t care, he could barely care to piss in the designated place for pissing.

It was just that Lomita had lived with people who took revenge, who believed in that code, and they were the most miserable people she had ever known. In her entire life. You cannot go through life righting wrongs, especially ones that you aren’t even sure are wrongs in the first place. She was familiar with the distort. She wanted to tell him how life can go wrong through maladjusted intention. She wanted to help him because she had nobody else.

Nobody else in her life.

And he was tangible, and she liked him.

*