Lomita’s hair was down now, lying with an independence on the pillow, not washed, she was obviously not strong enough for water to be applied too heavily to her body.

Manita was first to hold her hand.

‘Siento que ya no estoy aquí Manita—’

She stopped and started again in English as she registered Ever’s presence.

‘I feel like I am not here anymore.’

Then adding the question.

‘Am I?’

‘Of course you are, it will all be fine.’

Manita was able to say that at least; unaware as she was of the truth.

What else can you say? This is a fucking huge, big, massive mess that will crash around us and change us all forever?

And that was with 10 mg of diazepam refusing the brain its full swirl of neurosis.

‘Can you leave me with Ever a while please Manita?’

She left, presumably to sit outside, and Ever took up a position by the bed and extended his hand towards hers.

They held.

Her eyes closed and she started to exhale with the faintest noise of congestion.

‘Hello Ever. How are you my sweet?’

She closed her eyes as if she was preventing more pain from coming in that could be received through the windows of sight and light.

‘I am OK. And you?’

‘I don’t know Ever, but will you at this point in my life, in our life, where all this has brought us – be true with me?’

A strange expression he thought; as strange as the first time she had used it. Truly. Do we like each other truly? He remembered.

‘Be true, yes I will. Of course I will.’

‘Tell me please Ever, what you feel about me.’

Ever did not know what to say.

‘In the way of my emotions?’

‘Yes.’

Said Lomita.

The banal directness of his own question embarrassed him but appeared to have flown over the frailty of Lomita.

‘I want to hear from you what you feel about me. After what I have done.’

Ever didn’t expect that coda to the question. He rethought his route through the unexpected turn in the conversation.

‘I don’t feel anything has changed in me, about you, with what has happened.’

‘It has for me. I can’t and don’t want to live with what I have done; the excuse that I didn’t mean to, or want to, would not even be true. That’s what I mean about true. Be true. I did what I did because of you Ever. So be true to me.’

‘You did what you did because of me, to stop me doing what you knew I would do.’