I heard Kurt rearranging himself in the tub beside me, a sloshing, slapping water noise. He propped himself up on his elbows and looked out into the trees.

“Do you want a beer?” he asked.

“No. Thanks,” I said.

“Some more weed?”

“Nah.” I closed my eyes and leaned back in the water. I heard the sound of a beer cracking open.

We let the previous hours wash away in the silence, until soon the dark rupture of the hike seemed like a strange, half-remembered act of imagination. Eventually, I heard Kurt laugh to himself under his breath, a gruff, amused chortle, which reassured me further. I hoped it signaled a return to our morning openness.

“What?” I asked. I kept my eyes closed, grinning in anticipation.

“Did I ever tell you about that deer down in Big Sur?” he said.

“No,” I said, eagerly. “What about it?”

“Well,” Kurt said, and swigged from his beer. “This was pretty insane. The day after that beach party down there I borrowed Yogi’s car. I wanted to go into town for some breakfast and stuff. Bring back some supplies. Everyone else was still sleeping in the driftwood, so I took the keys and walked up to the parking lot and took off. It was a really beautiful morning, man. The poppies were blooming, the eucalyptus was really sweet. I was driving along this winding road, feeling good, when all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I hit this deer.”

“Oh shit,” I said.

“I know. It was awful. I stopped and drove back, and found her on the side of the road. This beautiful, brown deer. Her nose was wet and her ears were folded back. She was still breathing, but she had gravel and dirt all skidded up in her flank. She was knocked out. I didn’t know what to do.”

My eyes were still closed and the sunlight throbbed through the branches, playing on the orange screens of my eyelids. I heard the sound of water spilling onto the wooden deck, footsteps slapping on the ground. I heard Kurt walk to the other end of the deck, the scuff of a lighter. I smelled the rich perfume of the weed.

Then Kurt’s footsteps slapped on the deck again. They seemed to be coming toward me. They got closer and closer, smacking on the wood, until soon I could feel Kurt standing right behind me. I could hear his heavy breathing and the leisurely cracking of his knuckles.