“Stop,” said Lauren, too loudly. All three babies jumped.

Cindy closed the book. She examined the front cover, running her thumb over the gold embossed title.

“Who sent you this?” said Cindy.

“I told you, I thought it was you.”

“I can’t imagine what you must have thought about me, then. I promise you, I would never gift someone something so … ugh. A book of scary stories about twins, for a woman who’s just had twins? How inappropriate can you get?”

Lauren couldn’t stop thinking about the mother in the story. She wanted to know whether she went ahead and threw her own babies in the river, and if they drowned. At the same time, she didn’t want to know, ever.

Cindy stood up and pushed the little book deep into the bookcase by the fireplace. “I wouldn’t read it if I were you. Give it to a charity shop, maybe. I’ll put the kettle on again, shall I?”

Lauren carefully arranged her face in a semblance of nonchalance. Underneath it she was a boiling ocean of mixed-up feelings. She wanted to be alone, to calm herself down, to try not to think too much about what she’d just heard. Also, more than anything, she wanted to get the book down and finish reading the story. Not knowing the end was somehow worse. Cindy wouldn’t understand—especially after she’d shouted at her to stop reading; Lauren wasn’t sure she understood it herself. She stood up, Riley still latched to her breast. She found her voice, small and careful. “Cindy, can you just pass Morgan over?” Cindy picked up Morgan from the carpet and tucked him into Lauren’s other arm.

“Thanks, lovely,” said Lauren. “I won’t have that tea just now, actually. I think I might go for a lie down.”

“You OK, Lauren?” said Cindy.

“Fine. A bit tired, that’s all. I’m sorry. Do you mind?”

“No, not at all.”

Cindy fastened Lucy into the car seat and stood up to leave. She opened the front door, letting the heat roll in.

“Shall I come again next week, or …”

“I’ll come out next week,” said Lauren, “to the park for a coffee. I promise. I’ll be less of a state then. I’ll even have a shower, how about that?”

“We’ll be honoured. I’ll tell Rosa.”

They kissed on both cheeks and Lauren shut the door with a foot, hearing the Yale lock click into place as she did. She looked down at the babies in her arms, sighing, smiling, for a moment feeling almost normal before the tiredness descended on her once more. She sank down into a chair and closed her eyes. She’d just sit for a second. Then she’d get the book down.